If there’s one thing I’ve learned in the few short months that I’ve had a long-distance relationship, it’s that words can’t express my relationship and the love that we share. When I first decided to attend the University of South Florida, leaving my hometown of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania along with my boyfriend who decided to go to school in Ohio behind, the first question people asked me was, “Well are you and your boyfriend going to stay together?” Without hesitation, I answered with a most definitely. In my mind love has no boundaries, including the distance between us. Just because I decided to go to school 1,000 miles away didn’t mean I loved him any less nor would my adoration for him diminish, and thankfully he understood that. On the other hand though, driving away from my bestfriend, sunshine, and other half of over two years to not know when I’d see him next shattered my heart into a thousand pieces.
"True love doesn't mean being insparable; it means being separated and nothing changes."
So here I am, on a flight taking me back to Tampa, my newfound “home,” but sadly, away from my true home. After visiting my boyfriend at his school this weekend put our relationship in a new perspective for me. Because to me, home isn’t a place or a physical house, but a person. My home is your arms, where I feel safest and most comforted; where I’m at my happiest.
From basically living together and being attached at the hip; inseparable, to going months on end without seeing my other half has no doubt been one of the hardest experiences I’ve gone through. But to others going through the same hardship as me: a long distance relationship, have no fear, it is possible. With lots of texts, Facetime calls, snapchats, “open when” letters, and never-ending plane (or car) rides, it’s possible and most definitely worthwhile. So let love guru Erin give you some pointers.
Communication & Trust Is Key
Personally, I never went to the same high school as my boyfriend, but thankfully we were only 20 minutes from one another. A college hundreds of miles away is a completely different story. Trust is something that needs to be built upon and established long before a long-distance relationship happens. How can you fully appreciate someone if you’re constantly worrying about who they’re with, what they’re doing or where they’re at? It’s not worth putting yourself through the worry if it’s going to eat you alive. With trust, comes communication. A relationship will go downhill faster than a college student’s bank account if communication isn’t your number one priority.
Constant Reassurance
As a long-distance relationship will inevitably put a strain and stress on a relationship, be sure to reassure one another of your love, as cliché as it sounds. Overuse “I love you.” It’s normal to miss them. Let me reiterate that: It is N O R M A L to miss your person, some days are harder than others, and everyone copes differently. It’s comforting to know that your special someone is thinking about you and I’m positive they’d feel the same way.
Plan Visits
Buy a plane ticket. Get in your car and drive. I promise you won’t regret it. Your bank account may hate you at the end of the week, but in reality you can’t put a price tag on love. The moments you share together are ultimately priceless. They’ve made new friends, fallen in love with their new school, so making you apart of their new life is important. When you do finally see them after spending so much time apart, it makes you cherish every moment, whether it be squeezing into their tiny twin XL dorm bed, having them show you around their new “home,” or just being included in their new life. Every minute of everyday counts.
"I'd rather see you one day a year, then see someone else seven days a week."
Saying Goodbye Doesn’t Get Any Easier
With every visit comes the next goodbye, but on the bright side it’s only temporary. No matter how we’ll be apart or where we are, my tears always seem to flow when it’s time to part ways again. Knowing that if it’s meant to be, someday I’ll get to wake up to him every morning and fall asleep to his snoring every night.
At the end of all this, no matter how near or far, your fairytale can come true. One day your plane ticket will only be a one way flight.
