It's safe and reasonable to say that I'm a very accepting, sensitive, and understanding person. I tend to tolerate more than I should and let things slide to reduce the chances of conflict. Like many people, I will hold my tongue, hide my feelings, and try to be the bigger person. Though the things I just said may sound like lovely characteristics, they are some of my biggest flaws. In the past, I've left my heart open for uncomfortable situations, disrespect, and people not knowing when to stop simply because I was so passive.
However, as much as I am loyal to a fault, I have a breaking point and when I reach that level, there is really no coming back from it. I will put up with things for days, weeks, months, and even years but whenever I'm done, I'm done. In my journey of truly learning, loving, and valuing myself, I learned that I have to let some people go...for good. It took some time put a learned a few very valuable lessons.
You always have control
You have control over all drama, pettiness, and tension in your life. You either welcome it in or let it stay there. There comes a point in time that you must take control of your relationships and situations and decipher if they are worth your time and energy or not. Whenever you feel that your life or balance is out of control due to a person or group of people, it's time to take control and cut them out of your circle and daily life.
They will label you as the bad guy
You know what selfish people hate...not being the focal point. Trust and believe me when I tell you that you will be made to look like the bad guy in the situation. It doesn't matter if they just wreak total havoc on your life and completely drained you, somehow you are in the wrong. Your name will be dragged, they will portray themselves as the ultimate victim, and you will be played off like you don't care about them or that you are the guilty party. Don't react. Don't feed into a petty trap and don't let a negative person make you believe the lies and mind games they are giving you. Are aren't the bad guy, you just aren't the puppet anymore.
Days of entertaining that person are officially over
"Whenever you stop clapping for the clown, he will stop performing." As long as you give negative people attention, they will keep their terrible acts going. For some people, your responses and hurt feelings only add fuel to their fire and give them the sense of control that they want. Whenever I cut ties with someone, I cut all communication as well. No calls, texts, visits, or time will be spent with someone that brings any drama or issues to my life. If they want to act like a fool, they're going to have to do that with someone else.
Forgive them even if they aren't sorry
The last and final component of closing a chapter or relationship is always forgiveness. Forgive yourself for going through any type of unhealthy or one sided ordeal and forgive the person that is in question. Moreover, forgive them even if they are not sorry. Forgiveness is less about the other person and more for your inner peace. Until you truly let go and forgive, you will not be able to move on. Don't harbor hatred in your heart. Let go and learn your lesson. I promise that closing this door will open others.
