Starting promptly at 9 p.m. Eastern time on Thursday, Jan. 27, FOX commentator and Marist grad Bill O'Reilly ate up the remaining space between his show and the second installment of the Republican debate series of the new year by reading viewer mail for the last few minutes of his program. Advertising his books, O'Reilly mentioned and read appraisals of the books in his "Killing..." series. "Killing Kennedy,","Killing Lincoln," and "Killing Patton." Oh! The show's about to start!
Moving on to the feature presentation. FOX News co-sponsored the headlining Republican debate with Google. Earlier that night was the first debate for the Republican candidates still in the Presidential nomination race, but far from the lead. The later debate housed the eight leading political personalities while everyone else is constricted to the earlier time slot. The first debate was comprised of former Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum, businesswoman Carly Fiorina -- who thinks she's leading overall, FOX correspondent Mike Huckabee, and former Virginia Governor Jim GIlmore -- who many are still just hearing of.
The latest poll out of Iowa has these underdogs all at two percent each, along with former Florida Governor Jeb Bush, except for Gilmore. His poll rating is in the decimals. Bask in the bubble bath of obscurity because the chances of winning the presidency, let alone a nomination, in this group are slim.
Now, onto the main event. The thing that got the most coverage from not just viewers but the media itself. Of course, I am talking about Donald Trump's rally, which he held simultaneously with the later Republican debate. The same Republican debate he was supposed to be a part of, debating, alongside his good friend and New York lifestyle enthusiast, Texas Senator Ted Cruz, if it weren't for Megyn Kelly being a "lightweight reporter."
Through a tweet early Thursday morning, Trump does what he does best: offending people by saying how he would offend them, with a clarification that he is trying not to directly offend them. If he were to set foot on that stage, he would have to face his media adversary, FOX correspondent and debate moderator Megyn Kelly. Two forces constantly clashing. The Moriarty to his Holmes, the Bolan to his Bowie, the lack of enunciation to his Sylvester Stallone- all rivalries that ironically put Trump in a favorable, commonly popular and well liked position.
(photo from talkingpointsmemo.com)
Shouting insults from behind the safe distance social media accounts provide and refusing to publicly show his face in front of Kelly, Trump exemplifies the courage of an innocent schoolboy with the embarrassment factor of someone who just learned how to curse for the very first time. Scared of a mere "lightweight reporter," Trump jumps away from the debate televised on FOX to a platform of his own, one that is covered by both CNN and NBC.
Trump's independent rally was to allow himself access to speak in front of the camera 100 percent of the time, a strategy every politician no doubt would look forward to. With the intent to avoid FOX News and Megyn Kelly in the hallway while walking to math class, Trump organized his rally into a fundraiser, almost like a telethon except with less Jerry Lewis jokes and more combovers who think like Jerry Lewis.
Trump raised $6 million through his live speaking event. Before it happened, Trump suggested donating the money to the Wounded Warrior Project. Wonderful timing as the Wounded Warrior Project received a "D" rating from the organization Charity Watch, a charity and fundraiser watch group that analyzes what these non-profit organizations are spending their donations on. Turns out the Wounded Warrior Project spends excessive money on themselves. An even more sinister punchline to this reality is that donations to Trump were never directly promised to any specific charities. Donations went straight to Trump's personal foundation.
Times up! No more Trump talk. Taking the seven podiums onstage in the Des Moines FOX-Google Republican Debate are Kentucky Senator Rand Paul, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie, Dr. Ben Carson, Senator Ted Cruz (TX), Florida Senator Marco Rubio, former Florida Governor Jeb Bush, and Ohio Governor John Kasich. Moderators are the FOX News correspondents Trump-repelling Megyn Kelly, Chris Wallace, and Bret Baier.
Already stirring up enough trouble with the party frontrunners, Kelly asks Cruz to respond to Trump's absence from the debate, calling him the "elephant not in the room." Without wasting the perfect set up, Cruz answers:
"I'm a maniac, and everyone on this stage is stupid, fat, and ugly. And Ben, you're a terrible surgeon. Now that we've gotten the Donald Trump portion out of the way..."
Single handedly, the funniest -- on purpose -- statement made in the entire debate and Ted Cruz's entire career. Probably the truest thing ever said by Cruz if it weren't meant to be sarcastic, and most likely something written for him.
Actually, scratch that. What Cruz said in college was the only joke he's ever conceived himself, only being funny within the context of how bad humor ages. Cruz takes on the role of responsible dad during this debate- his podium was directly in the middle- so not many shenanigans came out of his corner. I mean, center. Aside from that, he still thinks carpet bombing can be strategic and Obama hasn't bombed ISIS enough -- even if the military is starting to run out of bombs to drop.
Rubio promised to unite all the "factions" of the right. He claimed "Obama wants to change America, make it like the rest of the world. We don't want to." Of course, why be like Europe with their free college, complimentary healthcare, exotic women, and effective gun safety laws. FYI, that's what voters should be calling them -- gun safety laws -- because it is reactive wording, like gun control, that gives people the wrong idea -- just like how lobbyists re-worded the "estate tax" to "death tax" to gain support from the working class. Although he does think Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders' socialist ideals makes him "a good candidate... for Sweden." Not like most American programs are, in hindsight, incredibly socialist.
When he wasn't defending his flip-flopping for past inconsistencies in his amnesty and immigration policies, there was not one talking point where Rubio did not somehow lead the answer back to ISIS. Questions examining Cruz's rhetoric or whether he is the rightful "heir" to Ron Paul's liberty movement had Rubio bringing up ISIS. At least once a debate, Rubio lists ISIS's atrocities: beating, enslaving, and murdering women and children. Nearly equivalent to the times conservatives jump on President Obama for refusing to utter "radical Islamic terrorism," Rubio cannot bring himself to make note of the gays thrown off buildings and stoned to death for their sexual orientation by ISIS. Trump recently dedicated himself to reversing the Supreme Court's decision on same-sex marriage, something Rubio states as one of the first things he will do in office.
Christie assured Kelly he would be able to stand for principles while "while getting things done" in government. Insert the power move where he references his stellar resume to reassure viewers of his success in New Jersey. Christie must be blind to the facts as even his hindsight is nearsighted. The New York Times narrows the days Christie spent inside the Garden State in 2015 to 191. Over half a year, mainly due to his uneventful campaigning. Read almost any Asbury Park Press article about Christie and you'll understand how much his own state "adores" him. He doesn't compromise his beliefs because he refuses to work with any of the New Jersey democrats. Therefore, nothing gets done. That and he thinks just because he was there for Hurricane Sandy in 2012 he gets a pass on not being home to deal with flooding on the coast from winter storm Jonas.
(photo from gawker.com)
Admittedly lagging in the polls, if they really translate to any actual voting trends, Paul seemed to be the most composed during the entire debate. Probably the most left leaning due to his origins as a Libertarian and affiliation with his father Ron Paul, Paul is the only Republican candidate making the NSA surveillance of American citizens an issue, calling out Cruz for not voting against the NSA or for auditing the Fed. Paul pointed out the impossibility of bombing both ISIS and the Assad regime in Syria as the loss of government structure would "form a more powerful ISIS."
Paul was that voice of reason audiences miss while waiting for the "real politicians" to say something "funny." Paul brought up his support of body cameras on police officers and even went into great detail on possible criminal justice reform, stating how disruptive fines/tickets can be on a paycheck to paycheck budget and the disproportionate statistics regarding how minorities suffer from the war on drugs and mass incarcerations.
Slow to react and seemingly not paying attention in the previous debate, Carson's first answer, a response to a question regarding his lack of political experience, seemed substance-less. Giving a first grade answer along the lines of "we need people who can think out of the box to solve problems, focus on problems, and solve problems...we need different solutions" makes him look as if he is still looking for those people willing to give him these answers. Thinking up a way to get out of that box would be a good start.
The boldest thing Carson said was calling Russian "President" Vladimir Putin a "bully", standing behind NATO if an attack on Russia is invoked. Just a few months ago, everyone was quoting Putin on something he obviously didn't say, concerning how he'd deal with ISIS, and now it is revealed he possibly masterminded the poisoning and killings of multiple government operatives. Calling him a bully just undercuts the threat him and his administration still legitimately poses to other countries.
When discussing the ethics of government regulation on oil, Carson stated he wants to make Europe dependent on the United States' abundant natural resources. On cue, alternative energy and climate change were not brought up. Embodying the core sentiment of nationalism, Carson quotes Teddy Roosevelt on that America, as a nation of immigrants, can only come together if they want to be Americans. It is identity stripping ideologies like that that made World War I possible.
The majority of Bush's screen time was spent attacking his fellow Floridian, Rubio. He did lay out his strategy to handle Syria, Iraq, and Afghanistan, topics seen as either Bush family heirlooms, keepsakes, or hand-me-downs. Samples of his plan include to arm the Kurds, put troops in Iraq, turn Syria into a no fly zone, create a safe zone to deal with refugees, and lead the Sunnis into Syria to fight. Really ambitious and hard to pull off without any mistakes. Sounds great, all the stars and planets have to do is perfectly align themsevles so disaster can be averted.
In the beginning of the debate, Kasich was clearly not allotted a fair amount of speaking time. He was asked some of the less relevant -- in terms of the typical debate subjects touched upon -- topics, from whether it is right to use backdoors for accessing encrypted technology, to the Flint, Mich., water crisis, which was as close to a climate change/environmental question that was going to be asked all night, aside from Rubio justifying the economy as more important than the environment. His highest note that night was when asked about an anecdote of invoking Saint Peter's judgement if Ohio did not expand Medicaid. Kasich turned the joke into a legitimate answer regarding Ohio's success in aiding the mentally ill and former drug addicts through recovery programs.
(photo from foxnews.com)
Rubio, Cruz, Bush all jumped on each other for flip-flopping. After an unraveling of a professional timeline over who currently supports amnesty and legalization rights for immigrants the least, let it be known that Rubio, Cruz, and Bush all supported amnesty at one point. Bush was quick to bring up Rubio's co-sponsoring of the Gang of Eight Bill allowing for a legal path to citizenship, which Bush supported. Video evidence of statements Rubio and Cruz made years prior put both of them on the spot. Cruz sidestepped in the argument to assert himself as the most right leaning person in the room, claiming Rubio "stood with Obama" and "took the direction of the major donors" while he "honored [his] commitments." In short, Cruz is quick to sell other people out. Which explains why he has no friends in Congress.
The best highlights of the entire debate include when Marco Rubio actually said, "There is only one savior, and that is Jesus Christ." What elicited that response: Bret Baier told him he ranked third in electability in Florida. I think it was a joke meaning even Rubio knows it's going to take a miracle to get him elected. Or when Chris Christie was actually asked about Bridgegate, when someone under the governor's administration shut down the George Washington Bridge out of spite for the Fort Lee mayor not providing Christie a mayoral endorsement. He said he fired the people responsible -- who were still employees of his administration -- then he rambled on about Hillary Clinton sending out spam emails, or something.
Or like when responding to videos of questions asked by YouTube celebrities, Bush thought Dulce Candy's name was cool and much deserving of our respect for having served in the armed forces and is now an entrepreneur. I think my PC senses might be tingling and I'm reading way too much into it, but does she not deserve our respect for also being an immigrant, a personal fact she led her question with? I'll agree with Carson that political correctness is "killing this country" as soon as the Republican Party stops calling itself the "Grand Old Party."
In sum, push a bunch of Reagan wannabes into a room, hand them a microphone and a Messiah complex, and you're bound to receive levels of insanity on par with 1980s John McEnroe. Just remember, it was memorable watching McEnroe descend into fits of rage when playing Borg from a stadium seat, yet slightly terrifying upon the realization it was all over a tennis match. Skip the alienation and overpriced ticket and watch the match from the safety and security of a remote hotel room a few countries away. At least three. And an ocean.
