I’ve yearned to always learn something new in my lifetime. Sure, my lifetime only spans 24 years; and I haven’t mastered anything yet, but I’ve always wanted to learn something new. When I’m 90, senile, and running around the streets of Boston yelling nonsense, I want people to be able to admit two things. First, he is obviously a safe kind of crazy. Secondly, that damn did he always try to live life and do something new. Maybe it is this insanity that I have that drives me to always be doing something, to always be moving, but whatever the cause, I love the effect. Whether it is mastering a move on the basketball court, or learning a new dance move in my bedroom on YouTube, or attempting to learn Swedish, or looking through the lense of a camera…I always want to be doing something.

I’m not here to tell you that this type of living is for everyone, and you should do it. Some people like predictability, they like being safe within the confines of their limits. As I get older, and continue to evolve I find myself pushing those limits and simply doing things with the objective of simply having fun. Within these things, I think it is safe to say I am looking for something. I’m looking for that part of me that I have not discovered yet, the part that’s buried beneath the surface waiting to be discovered. This even constant pursuit defines me as someone who is defying labels. I don’t aim to be a jock, or a nerd, or an artist, etc. I’m simply just trying to be myself, doing things I’ve always wanted but never had the courage to try.

This life is far too short to live in fear. There is living within your comfort zones and experiencing life, and then there is the fear of the unknown as an evil. Not knowing the future can be intimidating, but if you are surfing the wave, you are in control of where you are going. I feel empowered when making choices for me because I feel they’re best for me. The independence, the freedom of making these choices is half the thrill. I’m seeking something in life, and with every decision I make, I hope I become one step closer to finding it. Though I am not overly religious, which is my generous description of my sheer Atheism, there is an element of Judaism that resonates with me. My first introduction to it was from the book Nick & Norah’s Infinite Playlist. Norah is explaining to Nick the concept of takun olam, an idea that the world is broken into pieces and the job of people is to find the pieces and bring them together, in order to make things whole again. There is more to this theory of takun olam, but this basic principle has stuck with me since I’ve first read that book.

The world is broken into pieces, and like Nick actually suggests, we are the pieces that are supposed to come together and piece the world back together again. The harder we try, the harder I try, to piece my own life together…the smaller the pieces seem to get. Whenever I think of this book and this concept, it reminds me to stop forcing things in life to work and come together. A natural progression of these things I try and piece together will happen should I stop forcing them. Forcing pieces of a puzzle together don’t actually complete the puzzle because they do not fit together perfectly. In my own life experiences, I’ve seemingly learned the less I force things and the less I try, the happier I am. The easier things seem to come together.