A few months ago I graduated high school, I enjoyed one of the last "normal" summers with my friends while we all still had minimal obligations, and definitely we were all busy being excited to go away to college. Over the summer a few people I had gone to school with got engaged, others joined the military, some joined the workforce immediately, a few did trade school type things, and in the fall most of us went to college.
Our whole lives we had all basically done the same things, because until you're 18 or graduated the majority of people did K-12 in a public school, but now the world was at our fingertips and it was OUR choice to pick a direction and start walking. Yet still, a few months ago I still had to ask the teacher to go to the bathroom and I still had to be home at 10 on weeknights and 12:30 on the weekends. Once you choose a direction, everything is brand new.
Which way is the RIGHT way? THAT is how everything gets so confusing. You have some people who have been engaged and now married and having babies, while some people haven't been in a relationship at all! That's okay! Some people move across the country to go to school, and some people stick at home and attend community college.
That's okay! Some people are in thousands of dollars in debt working towards their degree, while other people are working hard in the workforce with valuable trade skills getting ready to buy a house of their own! That's okay! It is all okay, and any of those options are the "right way" for that person.
However, it is difficult to not get confused. When should I be getting engaged? When should I be finishing my degree? When should I be moving out for real? When should I know what I want to do for the rest of my life? It is also okay to do all of the things that you would like to do on your own time. Just because someone else may seem more or less successful than yourself means nothing. Everyone's on their own personal timelines, and it's more than acceptable for yours to be different.
It is important to take a step back and look at the big picture. The average lifespan in the U.S. is 78 years old. Some of us aren't even a quarter of that age. You are not expected to have it all planned out.
There is no "right way"! So change your major, try trade school, travel, join the military, take a semester off, explore all of your options. As long as you're actively trying, everything just falls into place. It's more than acceptable to not have everything figured out and to just take your time.
"But none of that matters at all." His head raised to stare balefully at me, but I said, incoherent yet convinced, "It's just—a way to go. There isn't only one way to go." I waved at his notes. "You're trying to find a road where there isn't one. It's like—it's gleaning in the woods," I said abruptly. "You have to pick your way through the thickets and the trees, and it's different every time." ― Naomi Novik, "Uprooted"
