In between shyness and charm lies an interesting personality unseen by the naked eye: the outgoing introvert. The outgoing introvert wakes up with bright eyes full of energy. This is the time to have an important conversation with her. Her tolerance for other people dwindles throughout the day, leaving her roommates to bear the brunt of an introvert that just spent her whole day around people (shout out to my homies). Think of her as an iPhone with 10% battery power. Don’t avoid conversations, but choose selectively. If her bedroom door is shut, she expects you to leave it that way. She processes the world only when she is alone, and if not given the time to do this, she is a ticking time bomb of frustration.
She knows everyone but chooses her inner circle of friends selectively. She will joke around with ease, meanwhile, a silent monologue of dread and anxiety runs through her head. The outer layer of bystanders compliments her on her confidence and ability to put herself out there, whereas her closest friends know someone completely different, someone a lot less public.
She’s quick to tell you decisions made in her drunken stupor but slow to tell you what she dreams about or the first man to break her heart. She’ll either text you 10 times in a row or never respond. She has her read receipts on so she doesn’t have to partake in small talk. Her biggest fear is talking to someone she doesn’t know well, but she’s the loudest one of the group. Do not take her lack of full disclosure as distrust, but do appreciate the details she shares along the way.
The outgoing introvert is stoic and has trouble expressing her feelings. She gets frustrated when people don’t know how she feels, but since she doesn’t express what’s going on in her mind often, she expects you to listen when she does. She thinks so deeply she cannot sleep. She’s always late but never misses a date. She loses her keys twice a week. There’s a tornado in her head and closet -- the world around her is not of concern.
She values her personal space and privacy. Ousting any information disclosed to those around her leads to automatic distrust. The outgoing introvert is difficult to get to know, but she’s usually a surprise to those around her- for better or for worse. She loves with her whole heart when she does love, but she takes a while to get there. She is typically concerned with her own thoughts and feelings. It’s not selfish or antisocial -- it is observant, detail oriented, and introspective.
The trouble with the outgoing introvert is the way people perceive her. Since she is known for being social, but her friends do not understand why she secludes herself. The difference between introverts and extroverts is the way they perceive the world; specifically, whether they get energy from solitude or others. The outgoing introvert needs time to be alone to recharge, which those closest to her tend to misinterpret due to her outgoing nature.
The good thing about the outgoing introvert is that she's no crap. You will know where you stand and why -- she is never ambivalent about how she feels. You also will never know what's coming. Each new day will come with a storm of surprises. Because she seems to lay her whole self out on the table with her outgoing personality, it is a surprise to all when every day comes to a new unpeeled layer of herself.
While it is incredibly frustrating to be misconceived as extroverted and misunderstood by those around you, it is an incredible gift to be an outgoing introvert. You have the ability to perceive others and the world in a way that is unique to you, and you can easily engage in this ability due to your outgoing demeanor. You are the Hannah Montana of personality types, you get the best of both worlds, and all the understanding that comes with it.
The concept of introversion and extraversion comes from Jung's theory of psychological types which include 16 different personalities.
