I’ve been in relationships; I’ve ridden that rollercoaster. Now being single I sometimes get asked, “Why are you single?” Here’s why:

I’m twenty-two. I have A LOT on my plate. I have two jobs, part-time school schedule, an internship, I'm vice-president of a club on campus, help a professor with research, and attempt to have a social life. These are all things that I have decided to do, don’t get me wrong. But there’s a reason that I’ve chosen to take on so much; it’s because I’m only going to be in this phase of my life once.

I’ll be honest; it would be nice to have a significant other. However, my goals are more important to me right now, than seeking out a relationship. I’m very much of the opinion that to be in a healthy relationship you need to be confident with where you are in life. By this, I mean that I want to be my best self for someone else. I’m still figuring out who that is and what that looks like for me. That’s completely fine! For me, I need to get some more accomplishments under my belt. I need to be independently sufficient. I need to explore the world.

I’ll admit that it is weird to see many of my friends getting married, or having kids. Mostly it's weird that I'm finally at the age where people start getting married. My friends are growing in the personal aspect of their lives, and I’m like, “I’ve got an essay or two to do this weekend, it’s cool.” And it’s hard to see it this way sometimes, but both areas of growth are equally exciting and important. I’m extremely happy for my friends whose families are growing or beginning. I’m also excited for me.

If someone had told me when I was 18 years old that I would be going into Social Work, living in a rural town, holding a position at a non-profit, working at a cafeteria, writing for an online magazine, holding a leadership position in a club, AND going to school, I would have told you that you were crazy. But here I am. I’m on the path to getting licensed and graduate with my Bachelor’s of Arts in Social Work. I’m looking into graduate programs. I’m making plans for international travel.

So, for anyone else who gets asked why you’re single, I implore you to respond with the following: “Because dating is not a priority for me right now.” Our society puts a lot of stock into relationship status. Facebook has even made it into a characteristic by including it in your 'About' section on your profile. Let me be clear, I’m not against relationships at all, and I’m open to being in one. But I don’t think that society should influence my feelings about not being involved in one.

Bottom line: being single is okay. Sometimes, it sucks. But I know that if I come home at the end of the day, and I’m happy with who I am, what I’ve done, and what I plan to do, then I’ve succeeded in something that another person can’t give me: self-actualization.