Some people are really surprised when I tell them that I'm an introvert.
"What? There's no way you're introverted. How can you stand on stage as a worship leader and be president of a student organization?"
Come, children. Let me tell you a secret.
Being an introvert does not mean that I can't talk to people. It doesn't mean that I can't get in front of people. And it definitely doesn't mean that I can't be a leader. Being an introvert simply means that being in a social situation for an extended period of time drains me of my energy, and in order for me to regenerate that energy, I need to spend some time on my own.
Y'all only see me when I'm being active in our club meetings or if I'm on the stage leading worship. But y'all don't see me when I'm prepping for these events, and y'all can't read my mind once an event is done. So I'm gonna let you in on a few things.
1. Before a large gathering, I take time to myself.
Honestly, thinking about being around a ton of people actually makes me a little anxious. So before I go to an organization meeting, I actually just chill in my room or an empty study space and do homework or watch funny YouTube videos to relax and prepare myself for anything social that I have to do in a couple of hours.
2. I literally spend hours each day before our meeting to think about things that I'm going to say or do.
In the days leading up to a meeting or a worship leading session or anything like that, I'll sit alone in a coffee shop or my room or another space and just think about everything that I want to say or share with people when the time comes. I'm kind of like JD from Scrubs. I have those little daydream moments from time to time.
3. When the meeting is over, I'm 150% done with everyone and everything.
Y'all, a one hour group meeting can be so draining for me. Just being in the presence of all of these people can really suck the energy out of me. I can probably talk to one or two people afterwards, because I honestly don't mind intimate conversation with a couple of people. But once everyone goes home, you can bet that I'll be in my room, snuggled up in my bed, watching Netflix, and spending quality time with myself.
Trust me, I love being a part of different communities. I love being a leader and challenging members of my organizations in discussions or other activities that we may be participating in. But at the end of the day, I really just want to spend time with myself and be alone and just chill. I wouldn't give up being a leader for anything, and I don't think I'm bad at what I do because of this. I'm just doing what I have to do to take care of myself, and I actually think that that's something that'll work in my favor when it's time for me to lead in any way.
