We could absolutely crave to be in complete solitude away from negative thinking and others criticizing us; but when we actually are alone, we miss the things that make us happy about the world and the people we love around us. Most humans in society are afraid of being left alone. They fear being left alone with their thoughts; they fear that they will essentially think themselves into a grave of unbearable doubt, anxiety, and depression.
I partially am very familiar with the fear of being alone; but on another hand, unbothered by the idea completely. Before I lived alone I thought a lot about how well I would do if I were alone. Alone being a life without a romantic partner, and without a partner to just do nonromantic things with. Now I am alone in both of those senses, and I couldn't feel more like something might be missing. I do understand the fear of being alone, however, I feel more in tuned with the people around me and I have found myself growing outside of my social circle.
In a very ironic way, forcing myself to be alone has pushed me to reach out to the world around me because I don't want to be alone forever. Now I am forced to understand that to have this fear of being alone, and being genuinely afraid and avoiding the idea is silly because we are technically always alone in our minds. There is never a second party to accompany us. No one to fill the blank spaces of our thoughts.
I think mostly our issue with being alone is an issue within ourselves. A lack of trust in ourselves, that we aren't strong enough to stop the bad thoughts that can come to any one of us. It is in loneliness we discover who we really are, what we want in life.
The ability to overthink a situation is a very convenient ability to have. One can use this power to look at all sides of the situation, a process that most tend to ignore.
I feel like we often ignore that these moments come in waves, and that life needs to have a balance of alone time and company time. As with everything in our life, everything needs balance. Keep that in mind and you will never feel like you are missing anything because you know it will come later, or you will eventually end up making up for it.
A good friend once shared a quote:
“Pleasure is just a pause between two moments of pain. Pain is just the space between two moments of pleasure.” —Ajahn Brahm
