I Didn't Love College
Start writing a post
Student Life

College Has Not Been The Best Years Of My Life, And I'm Ok With That

I truly believe that the best is yet to come.

College Has Not Been The Best Years Of My Life, And I'm Ok With That
Emma Barrera

I haven't had a "normal" college experience. Nor am I the kind of person who really takes pride in my university. It isn't in my Instagram bio. I don't post a lot of pictures on campus. From conversations I've had, it seems like a lot of people don't even think I'm in school anymore.

I spent my freshman year of college in a state of a mental health crisis. I was out drinking three nights a week. I didn't go to class. I went from graduating high school with a 4.1 GPA to ending my second semester with a 2.8 GPA. I hid myself from the world. I gained 30 pounds. I had completely lost myself.

In April of my freshman year, I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. I almost didn't go back to school, an idea that was unfathomable for me in high school. I had to go to high school. I had to stay in the major I originally picked.

The plan was the plan, and it needed to stay that way.

I transferred at the end of my third semester of college, another idea that I thought was taboo when I originally applied to college. I felt weak for not "sticking it out." But the only way I was going to get better is if I was at a school closer to home. So I made that happen.

I went from living in the dorms to living at home. I thought that was a temporary thing. But it's turned into an 18-month thing. And I struggle with that immensely.

I'm not involved in much at school. My commute is half an hour. I work two jobs. I've developed a sort of apathy towards the college experience.

I go to school to take my classes so I can get an expensive piece of paper that will allow me to get a job. But I value my work experience way more than I value my classroom experience. I'm graduating in three years instead of four. Because the less time I have to be there, the better.

A lot of times, when I say I'm ready to get the hell out, I'm met with, "No! Stay in college forever! Life sucks afterward!" Sometimes it's, "Working is not as fun as college. Just live it up now before you have to be a real person."

Here's the deal. My college experience has been marked by a lot of trauma. And like I said, I work two jobs. I have my goals for the future in sight. I know what I want. I know what I need. And most importantly, I know what I deserve.

When I graduated high school, I couldn't wait to have an adventure. No rules. No curfew. No asking for permission to do things. But I lost myself. Most of college is actually a fog for me. I don't remember weeks of my life due to the intense mental trauma I experienced.

So no, I don't want to stay in college as long as I can. I don't think working will be worse than sitting in class. These have not been the best years of my life.

In fact, college has been the biggest struggle of my life. And I'm ready to move on.

Not everyone can be a frat star. Not everyone will get that 4.0 GPA. Not everyone will get to carry out the plan they started.

And that's okay. Because we all experience life in a different way. But if I'm telling you that I didn't get out of these years the same joy you did, don't criticize me for that.

I had to grow up and grow out of the college mindset very quickly because my health and well-being had to be the priority. I lost more friends than I kept. I felt like I let myself down so many times.

For me, college is a series of days that bring me one step closer to my expensive piece of paper. So I don't need anyone telling me that I should stay there longer. Because I've had enough trauma for a lifetime throughout my college experience. I'm absolutely ready for what's next.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

7 Tips For Traveling

Don't miss any of these ideas to make your trip complete!

7 Tips For Traveling

Whether it's a day trip, an out-of-state journey, or an experience leaving the country, here are some tried and true traveling tips.

Before any trip, we all think about what to pack and what to bring. We may have a strict itinerary, or we may have looser guidelines for what to do when. But we should also consider the following - make them goals:

Keep Reading... Show less

Writer of the Month: Hunter Johnstone

As an aspiring author, Hunter knew writing for Odyssey would be a great fit for her.

Writer of the Month: Hunter Johnstone

Response writers are what make the world go round at Odyssey! Using our response button feature, they carry on our mission of sparking positive, productive conversations in a polarized world.

Keep Reading... Show less
Allison Fishman

1. Why is Wilson Hall so complicated to navigate? Even as a senior, I still get lost in Wilson. As a freshman, I was warned about the unnecessary complexity of the building, was laughed at by upperclassman for my confused looks on the first day of school and walked and rewalked the whole hall before finding my classroom. #annoying.

Keep Reading... Show less

Blair Waldorf For governor of new york

What life would be like if the people were led by Queen B.

Blair Waldorf For governor of new york

Cynthia Nixon, a.k.a Miranda from Sex and the City, is running for governor of New York. I think that this would be the best decision that has been made in a while solely based off of the fact that almost no one knows New York like the cast of Sex and the City. This got me thinking about who else would be a good candidate to take over the city of dreams. Then I realized that Blair Waldorf, if she were a real person, would be my number one choice for governor. Here are five reasons why Queen B would be an excellent ruler.

Keep Reading... Show less
Student Life

Why Littles Rock

Who doesn't want to be an awesome big?


We see ourselves getting further into the semester.

Keep Reading... Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments