As kids, we don't think about the struggles of becoming an adult.
We don't worry about bills or a job, as kids and teenagers, we just go about our lives and not stress out about too much. Becoming an adult now, I look back and realize how easy I really had it.
Yes, I had a job in high school, but I think pretty much everyone does. But even a job in high school is easier than working a full-time job AND being a full-time college student versus a high school student. It's very hard and it's very stressful. It can really take a toll on people, physically, mentally and emotionally.
I never realized how hard life could really get and be. It's become too overwhelming for me. And by that I mean, the stress of school and work and bills and just being an adult has taken its toll on me.
When I was younger, I had never suffered with depression and bad anxiety, and honestly, I didn't think I ever would. However, it has somehow now taken over my life. Over the last 2 1/2 years of being on my own and trying to figure out the ropes of life, I've grown very stressed out (way more than I should be) and I started getting very depressed.
I shouldn't be too surprised by it because it does run in my family. Life has recently just finally become too much for me to handle and I need a break. I have noticed that my mental health needs a lot of attention and taken care of.
They say college and your 20's are supposed to be some of the best years of your life, but so far, I don't feel like they have been for me.
Don't get me wrong, I've had fun and I love being independent, but the stress and pressure that comes with it, has finally caught up with me. I'm usually a very happy, cheery person and love to be around people. But now, I don't even want to leave my bed or talk to anyone.
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I'm a very driven person and motivated to get stuff done, I don't feel any motivation for life or drive to do anything. I don't talk and open up as much around my family. I could go on and on about the internal, mental issues that I'm suffering. Things that I had no idea that I was even capable of feeling. I feel very lost in life. The stress has caused me to lose a ton of weight which is completely unhealthy
I said I needed a break, and that's exactly what I've decided to do.
Take a break. I've decided that I'm going to move back home for a little bit to help me save money. And I've also decided to take a semester off of school and rid myself of that stress, which weighs a lot on me. Are my parents happy about this? No. Do I feel like I'm letting everyone down? Absolutely. But am I doing what's best for me? Most definitely.
Taking this break will allow me to focus on mental and physical well-being. It'll allow me to get a full-time job and save money. Of course I plan on going back to school and moving back out on my own, but for now, I don't think there is anything wrong with me needing a breather from it and trying to find your way again.
To those of you out there who feel the same way, you're not alone. Do what you feel is best for you.
