Some days are just meant to be really, really bad days. The sad truth is that sometimes the really, really bad days can turn into weeks, maybe even months. Maybe you’re going through a breakup, you just had a fight with your best friend or the mythical (but all too real) sophomore slump has you feeling stuck. No matter what’s getting you down, everyone deserves a chance at happiness and the only person able to give you that is YOU. Self-love is as simple as falling in love with yourself, as hard as that might be.
Don’t let what others might think, keep you from the wonderful things you could do.
I’ve always known that it’s impossible to assume you can please everyone, but that never stopped me from trying. After struggling for a long time to see myself in a positive light, I realized it was because the opinions of others played such a big role in the way I perceived myself. When everyone loves me, I thought, I’ll be able to love myself. I know now that is not the case. There should have never been a condition to loving myself. Besides, once I started to do the things I really wanted to do, loving myself came naturally. You are practicing self-love when you ignore social pressures and do the things that make you happy, not the things you think other people want you to be doing.
Stop letting things that happened in the past hurt you. Create a future for yourself instead.
You are in college, a time for change and a time for mistakes. Yes, mistakes! I am no stranger to the word, and for a long time I let that keep me from moving forward or taking chances. Being afraid of making another mistake is suffocating you as much as those 5-inch heels you wore to formal and "swear" weren't cutting off your circulation. Failure is to be expected when you're growing up. It’s perfectly acceptable to mess up every now and then, but it's never OK to let that keep you from succeeding later. Love yourself for the person you’ve become because of the mistakes you’ve made, not in spite of them.
Put your heart first.
It's always good to think of others. Be kind, encouraging, patient…you know, all the ways they taught you to treat others before you could brush your own teeth, or spell your last name. It seems like second nature to be considerate of other people, so why is it that making yourself a priority is such a foreign concept? What we are having to learn now is to be kind to our 18-20 something year old hearts. Of course it’s an incredible thing when someone is able to act selflessly, but too often we forget that its not selfish to take some time for yourself. Take yourself on a date. Do your favorite things. Read a book. Take a little bit of time to be with yourself.
Remember that just because today wasn't extraordinary doesn't mean you aren’t.
Life is unpredictable. One day might be filled with opportunities, adventures, new people, and new things, but the next day might be just the opposite. Boring weeks don't mean you have a boring life and it certainly doesn't mean that you’re a boring person. Look back on the life you’ve had. If someone were writing the book of you it would be pretty great. The story you have so far is filled with so many chapters worth of adventures, happy and sad. The thing is, though, that your book isn't over when you’ve had a lame day or even a lame month. You have your whole life ahead of you, and the story definitely isn't over yet.
People will come into your life and people will leave. Just because someone doesn't fit, doesn't mean you need to change.
At some point for everybody, it was decided that an important person would no longer be a part of their life. Whether there was a huge falling out, or two people just drifted apart, the nature of the loss doesn't change the toll it takes on a person’s self-esteem. An unfortunate reality of this is that everyone deals with this type of loss, and you are not the only one. If losing friends, boyfriends, or anyone else you might have been close to meant that there was something wrong with you, then everyone else would be pretty messed up too. In college, you grow and change and people will be there to watch that happen. Never let someone else's presence or lack thereof change your path towards becoming who you are meant to be.
Learning to love yourself as radically as you should isn't as easy as reading a couple of steps about how to do it. The guide itself was written by a girl who still has to work on it every day. It's a process, but we are all worth it.
