The Pre-College Cuffing Stigma Couldn't Be More Wrong, I'm Happy I'm Not Single

The Pre-College Cuffing Stigma Couldn't Be More Wrong, I'm Happy I'm Not Single

If it's true love, your partner will not hold you back from having a good time because your happiness will bring them joy.

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To my surprise, I was asked well over five times if my boyfriend and I would continue being together when I went off to college. Without a thought, I replied "Of course" every time and would see their dumbfounded expression shortly after. The question felt bothersome and uncomfortable every time, but I was aware of why they were asking: teenagers entering college are often advised not to begin college "tied down" because for some reason, being in a relationship equates to a lack of fun in their minds.

Being that my boyfriend is six months younger than I am, he would be starting his senior year of high school as I entered my freshman year of college. The college I would attend, Stony Brook University, is an hour or so from his house, but can very well be more than two hours on a bad traffic day.

The commute is much too far for me to live at home, so we wouldn't be able to see each other every day like we were used to. Although this was a sad and scary thought, I never had a doubt that we'd be able to make it work.

I still cannot wrap my head around the misconception that having a boyfriend prevents me from having fun in college because I have my most enjoyable moments when he comes to visit me or when I read his cute texts throughout the day. Even if a certain event doesn't involve him, I still have a great time with my girlfriends who provide me with endless laughter and smiles.

If it's true love, your partner will not hold you back from having a good time because your happiness will bring them joy.

The only reason people say you can't have fun in college if you're in a committed relationship is that you can't hook up with other people. Many people feel as though that's what college is for, but newsflash, it's actually to receive an education. Everyone is different, but personally, I would much rather have one person in my life to devote my love to than wasting time on a bunch of little flings.

My boyfriend and I were very quickly able to find an effective way of making time for each other both in person and when we couldn't physically be together. I made a schedule to come home every other weekend, if possible, and if he is able, he visits me one day on the weekends that I don't come home.

Although I still miss my family very much on those weekends that I stay at college, his presence provides me with a sense of comfort and we always have a fun time to distract me from my homesickness. Throughout the week, we call each other every night over FaceTime to see each other's face and hear each other's voice.

Many of the friends I've made at college I was able to bond with because we missed our boyfriends back home. One of my good friends has created the exact same schedule that I have of going home every other weekend and seeing her boyfriend at school when she doesn't go home. My other friend suffers through the long train rides to go home and see her boyfriend every weekend. Although sometimes it takes sacrifices to see our significant others, we wouldn't want it any other way.

I don't know how I would've gotten through this semester without my boyfriend. He was my shoulder to cry on when I didn't do well on a test or had a fight with a friend. When I didn't think I could finish my homework because it was just "too hard," he would motivate me in various ways so that I'd get it done. Every time that I cried because I wanted to go home, he'd remind me that I'd soon be surrounded by all of the people that I love.

The idea that "distance makes the heart grow fonder" is proved to me every day as I FaceTime my boyfriend and yearn to launch through the screen so I can hug him. I never feel as though my relationship is a burden in any way, but I consider it to be one of the best things that's ever happened to me.

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To My Boyfriend's Mom

He loves you more than you could ever imagine...
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Without you, there would not be a him, so first things first, thank you.

1. Thank you for teaching him to love a woman the right way, to put God first, and YOU before me always, the respect he shows you is so attractive, and you deserve it.

He talks about you like you hung the moon, I don't doubt for a second that he will be an amazing father one day, I owe all of that to you.

2. Thank you for giving me a chance, learning to love me when you knew your son was doing the same.

I can't speak for my own first impressions, but hopefully mine was not THAT bad...when we both slapped him on the arms for his rude remark at the same time, I knew our relationship was already blossoming.

SEE ALSO: Finding A Husband In College

3. Thank you for every meal you have ever purchased me.

And chocolate, and candy...you know just as well as your son does that food is the way to my heart. Especially Taco Bell and cheesecake ;)

4. Thank you for your advice, suggestions, and opinions...and asking for mine

Whether it's telling me to slap him for being a smart a$$, or you're asking me about color swabs for your kitchen makeover, you come to me as if I am your own, and I am so honored to give you my own input.

5. Thank you for including me

You never fail to leave a spot for me, and I love family dinners/outings with you guys just as much as I love my own!

6. Thank you for teaching your son to never give up, and that if he does it is only to better himself, or it's the only choice he has left.

He is so focused on his future, he wants the best for himself, and he is constantly reminding me that these are things that YOU taught him, you deserve to be so proud.

7. Thank you for letting him love my family, and allowing me to love yours.

He is so loyal and loving to my family, and I don't even have to ask myself why because I see him with you and yours. Thank you for letting us double up on holidays when we can, and making sure we get the most out of our time with you!

8. Thank you for being his best friend.

I think of him as mine too, but I couldn't think of a better person to also hold that title, you know him better than anyone else and you always will.

9. Thank you for teaching him how to treat a woman

He is constantly telling me "You sound like my mother." Thankfully earlier in our relationship, he told me that the woman he wants to be with, should do just that. He always tells people who try, "No, no one calls me by my full name except my mom and my girlfriend."

10. Thank you for your honesty

We all know that he and I can drive you crazy sometimes, thank you for telling us like it is, and making sure we know you still love us anyways.

SEE ALSO: 8 Tiny Lies Every Young Woman Has Told Their Best Friend

11. Thank you for teaching him to work as hard as possible in anything and everything he does.

I have never met anyone with such a desire for success, he and I are constantly discussing how we can better our futures, and I know exactly where his drive comes from.

12. Thank you for teaching him to clean up after himself

Even though sometimes, it takes him a minute to do so.

13. Thank you for teaching him how to love, and letting him love me.

I have never felt so loved by a man, probably because anyone else who came into my life was just a boy. Thank you for your unconditional love for him, he is your entire heart and that is so easy to see, I am happy to share his with you.

You and I both know that even years from now we will both occasionally probably be closing the fridge that he left open, cleaning the crumbs he dropped, demanding he take a shower after playing soccer, or reminding him 20 times about plans we made weeks ago, we both share such a great love for such an amazing man. I could never be more thankful that you brought forth into this world such a comforting, supportive, protective, steadfast, driven, handsome, and hilarious guy. Thank you for everything you do for him, for me, and for us, I love you a lot!

Cover Image Credit: casey

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A Well-Deserved And Long Overdue Thank You To My Boyfriend

I know it's cliché, but he deserves it.

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Thank you for choosing me and loving me unconditionally every day. I do not deserve the love that you radiate, but I am beyond thankful for it. Thank you for showing me kindness in every action and for listening to every pointless story I have. Thank you for being the person I can go to 24/7 with any piece of news. Thank you for being the only person who can make me laugh when I am not in the mood at all. Thank you for picking up all of my pieces and wiping all of my tears. Thank you for making sure I always feel loved.

Thank you for believing in pinky promises just as much as I do and for making sure you never break them. Thank you for always reassuring me even though it gets annoying. Thank you for believing in me and pushing me out of my comfort zone. Thank you for knowing when I need a confidence boost, when I need a push, or when I just need a shoulder to cry on. Thank you for taking the time to learn everything about me.

Thank you for never giving up on me no matter how grumpy I get or how hard our week has been. Thank you for never going to sleep mad and always saying "I love you" before we leave. Thank you for the tight squeezes and play fights. Thank you for the deep belly laughs and jam sessions in the car. Thank you for the late-night phone calls when I can't sleep and for doing everything you can to make me better when I'm sick. Thank you for loving me no matter what and no matter when. Thank you for all of the memories. Thank you for holding on tight and never letting go.

Thank you for being everything I could ever want and for showing me what love really is.

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