If somebody told me my parents would be divorced by the time I was 13, I wouldn't have believed them. I mean, don't get me wrong, they were far from perfect. But you never think it will be you, til it is. I remember some of my friends in middle school talking about their parents' divorce and thinking that will never be me. Little did I know a year later that would be my fate. It's hard, it's emotional, and it's painful. And for the longest I thought it would never get better.
It's hard when all of my friends' parents are still together. They're celebrating anniversaries for many years of being together and I can't help but feel a stab of jealousy. Their whole family gets to be together every birthday, Christmas, and holiday. Meanwhile, I'm having two birthday dinners and two Christmases. People think that's so great because you get twice as many gifts. Yeah, that is great and all, but sometimes it gets tiring and overwhelming. It consists of many overnight bags packed and traveling back and forth between houses.
If your parents are still together, don't take that for granted. You should be grateful and let them know that. While you get to have one big birthday celebration with your family, I have to schedule two different days to celebrate mine. While you're getting excited on Christmas Eve thinking about opening your presents the next morning, I'm worrying about which house I'm going to be staying at for the night. Then I get feel guilty and depressed because my other parent will be waking up on Christmas morning without their kids in the house. You got to grow up with your siblings under the same roof. I haven't lived in the same house with mine in 9 years. You may think that's not a big deal, but I will never be on the same personal level with mine as you are with your siblings. We will never have that level of closeness we had when we were kids. That was stolen from us, and I think that's one of the things that still bothers me.
For those of you that have divorced parents, you're not the only one in that situation. And I'll be the first one to tell you it gets better. Instead of having two parents, I have four. I have four wonderful parents to love me, guide me, and help me get through this thing called life. So, even though it still gets to me sometimes and hurts like hell, I remember that I have an amazing stepmom and stepdad that I wouldn't get to call family if my parents never divorced. So, to my parents, thank you. Thank you for giving me the best possible life you could give me. Thank you for giving me the best stepparents I could ask for. I couldn't imagine life without them. I love all four of you with my whole heart.
