From The Child Of A Drug-Addicted Parent
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Health and Wellness

From The Child Of A Drug-Addicted Parent

I couldn't save you, but you sure as hell destroyed me.

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From The Child Of A Drug-Addicted Parent
Christian Allard / Unsplash

To the parent that chose drugs over their own child,

Let me start off by saying that I'm sorry. I'm sorry that you feel the need to use drugs as an excuse and to mask the guilt that you may (and probably do) have.

I never expected it to come down to this. I never expected me to come after drugs on your list of priorities. I spent so much time and energy wanting you to change and finally hit the point where I gave up on trying to care and help. I never said the ultimate threat: "It's either drugs or me. Take your pick" and you know why? Because I would be heartbroken knowing that I would not be your answer.

Plain and simple, your decision was (and still is) selfish and I will never be able to forgive you. Parents are supposed to encourage their children and watch them grow up and see their children hit so many milestones as they get older, but you weren't that kind of parent. And you know what is the worst thing in the world is? Getting a Facebook message from you telling me that you love me. Do you really? Or do you only say that because if you didn't, you'd feel like a terrible parent?

I'll never understand why someone I'm supposed to love and trust could do so much damage in my life in just a short amount of time and not even try or attempt to repair the damage.

I know that I will never be at peace with you for what you've done. I constantly see other people my age posting pictures with their dad's and I can't help but feel jealous. For years, I've wanted to know what that father/daughter relationship felt like, but instead, I'm furious with you and feeling neglected at the same time. There will always be a void in my life and in my heart and I will never forgive you for choosing to dig yourself an early grave instead of being a parent.

Thank you for allowing me to see what I don't want to end up doing in life. Instead, I'm on my way to completing a 4-year degree at a university for a degree that I've been talking about non-stop for years. I will soar in life and be successful at whatever I do. Enjoy watching from afar because if I wasn't first on your priorities list, you won't be mine, either.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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