There’s this thing about choices - if you don't make them quick enough they, might make themselves. That's what I've learned. This is what I've become really good at - waiting. Letting the earth or God or whoever is making my decisions do it for me. If you don't know where to go to school, eventually you will figure it out. Should you quit your job or stay? Stay for a while and maybe you'll just get fired, if not well there you go, you're in this.
The world is changing, constantly! You're changing constantly. Even in your sleep your body is changing, leaving you behind, so every decision you make doesn't need to be the biggest decision of your life. When you wake up in the middle of the night sweating praying to God, begging for your way over will not matter, and I know you don't believe me. Writing this I don't believe myself. My problems now to me are the biggest thing I'm facing. They seem huge like I will never forget the echo in my head that's screaming, reminding me that this is what you want, and this you must receive. If I don't get it, I won't die -the world won't end, and nothing will change except the change itself.
You don't have to stress. You can go with the flow, that's what I am learning. Follow what feels good and true, but fight only when you need to fight. Only when your only option is to fight and if you need something so bad that you know your life will never be as good with out it, then fight like hell. Fight until what you're fighting for has no choice but to give in to your needs. Get what you want and be ruthless in finding it. But before you do this, before you lose control clawing the eyes of every enemy in your path, make sure that the thing you're fighting for is as important as you think of it. When you waste your time fighting for the wrong thing, that is the type of thing you need to decide to change. The kind of time you don't want to lose.
Change isn't something to be scared of, though I myself am often hiding from it. New things will come and become old, and right when you're comfortable, it will happen again. That is life, but this as well is subject to switch up on you. There's no one you will disappoint but yourself, who you should never let down. The people you love will forgive you for disappointments - that's what love means. So change things. If there is something in your life you are unhappy with, get rid of it. If that boy is giving you a headache or a heartache or anything else, then you change the way you deal with him, or get rid of him all together. I'm not saying don't try because I believe everyone deserves whatever type of effort they have earned, but I am saying when it comes time to make a choice in the dreadful situation, this one refuses to make itself. You can leave whatever hurts you.
If you’ve spent all day trying to decide what is right, and you’ve made pros and cons lists until your fingers started to bleed, then your situation is not dire and a choice probably doesn’t have to be made. Let your hands heal and try again later. You will know what is right when it is right, that is the point. If things don’t make sense now, they will later, and stressing over when later will come is not going to help your situation at all. Change the way you look at change or let your mind correct itself. The world will not end when you make it wait - give yourself more time to look at it, take a nap on it, and your problem will always be there when you wake up.
