Dear SJWs, Stay-At-Home Moms Can Be Feminists, Too

Dear SJWs, Stay-At-Home Moms Can Be Feminists, Too

Don't claim to be a feminist and then bash Cardi B for staying at home with her daughter instead of going on tour.

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Nowadays, I feel like feminists need to be reminded of what the true definition of feminism is. Yes, it is advocating for equal rights between men and women. And one of those rights is choice. The freedom to choose. Us women have to be more accepting of other women's choices, even if they don't necessarily align with ours.

Okay, so you want to go to law school and become a lawyer before getting married and having kids. The girl next to you may want to get married at 20 and have little kids running around everywhere. Both of these women are allowed to choose what they want to do with their lives.

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The other day, I was talking to my friend and she told me her best friend got married back in June. Her friend was only 20, just two years older than me. What shocked me more was that she just met the guy in January of the same year. I'm not gonna lie, I was disgusted by this girl's reckless decisions, even though I've never met her in my life.

But then, my friend explained to me that the bride wanted to get married and have kids since she was little. She showed me pictures of the wedding and this so-called reckless girl looked so happy in her bright green sari. There wasn't a single picture where the girl wasn't smiling. This 20-year-old girl got the wedding of her dreams. And that was her choice.

At first, I thought this girl had no value in herself. That she was a typical brown girl groomed by a patriarchal society to become a baby machine. It took me a while to realize that she was happy. She is still going to college and working, so she still has aspirations. Her aspirations just happened to include a husband at a young age.

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My own mother stayed at home for most of her life, raising me and my three sisters. And she is one of the strongest women I know. She believes in raising her daughters the same way she would raise a son. Some families would force their daughters to marry as young as possible, but my mom always believed in her daughters getting a proper education and succeeding in their careers before settling down. Just because my mother was a stay-at-home mom doesn't mean she doesn't have value in herself. As a woman, she does whatever she pleases without paying heed to others opinions or comments.

Recently, Cardi B dropped out of Bruno Mars' tour for this fall because she wanted to stay at home with baby Kulture. When she announced this on Instagram, some people threw a virtual fit:


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Instagram

Instagram

So many people, especially other women, are bashing Cardi just because she wants to spend time with her baby daughter. She just isn't mentally prepared to leave baby Kulture behind to go on tour, and that is perfectly fine. It is her choice to prioritize being a mother over her career.

And the same people who are bashing Cardi for her decisions would also put down women like Kim Kardashian for working too much and not caring about her kids.

Moral of the story: women seem to never win. Another moral of the story: women need to stop bringing other women down. We need to support each other and respect each other's choices because that is the definition of a true feminist. Do not judge women for covering their hair, or being a housewife, or marrying at 20. If that is their personal choice and they are happy with it, we are in no place to criticize their decisions and deem them any less of a woman.

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Sincerely, The Girl Who Dreams Of Having The Corner Office And A Family

Last time I checked, I'm capable of simultaneously running the world and a household.

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This story requires us to fast forward 15 years in the future and to use our imagination a little.

The year is 2034 and I wake up every morning beside my loving husband in our beautiful house in the suburbs just in time to make breakfast together for our children before they sleepily come down the steps into the kitchen. I clean my kitchen and make sure all of the morning chore's are completed before we get our children ready for school. I kiss my husband goodbye as he leaves for his job in the city and I get the kids into the car to take them to school. After dropping them off at school, I head off to work at my high powered job.

I arrive at work prepared for a day full of meetings with people who don't have any time to waste and know much more than I ever will know. I 'm introduced to people who have titles much higher than mine and people who may never be bothered enough to remember my mine. I have a packed schedule but I'm doing what I love most and what I always dreamed of doing with my life. I will smile as I look out of my corner office knowing I have worked my a** off to get where I am and that I deserve everything that I have earned in life.

The clock reads 5:00 pm and I say goodbye to everyone in the office as I hurry to my car because my day is far from over. I have a PTA meeting to run at 5:30 pm and then one of my kids has a soccer game at 6:30 pm. After that, we go get ice cream to spoil our dinner and celebrate, win or lose and then finally head home where I cook dinner for my family. I will finally be able to rest after my husband and I put the kids to bed, but I will be smiling because I know that I have worked my a** off to have my family which I'm so proud of.

Now back to the future, where I find myself being told that it's almost impossible to be able to have the best of both worlds. I'm told that I have to pick one or the other, or if I don't then I have to expect to not be very involved in my future children's lives. Or I'm told that I won't be able to be at the top of my field.

My dream is to be at the top of my career and to have the typical 9-5 filled with meetings and the occasional days where I have to stay late at the office. I also want to live the typical soccer mom life where I'm President of the PTA and at every single soccer game and recital for my future kids. I know that these two dreams don't mix well because of the time that both require in order to be successful at both, but I'm not one to back down from a challenge.

I and other women that have similar aspirations are capable of doing both if we choose so we shouldn't constantly be told that we can't. We know we can have the best of both worlds one day and we can't wait. See ya in 15 years when I'm President of the PTA and at the top of my field.

Love,

The Girl Who Dreams of Having The Corner Office and a Family

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As A Woman, I Don't Think Men Are Swimming In A Pool Of Privilege, We Need International Men’s Day

Men are our providers and protectors.

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Most of you have probably heard about International Women's Day with Snapchat filters, Google Doodles, and "the day without women" started by the Women's March, but have you ever heard about a holiday where the accomplishments of men are celebrated? Such a holiday is in existence and it's called International Men's Day.

International Men's Day was started by Thomas Oaster and was enacted on February 7th, 1992, with the intentions of the promotion of gender equality, highlighting male role models, and focusing on the health and wellbeing of men and boys. Despite what you hear from leftist academia and media, men and boys aren't swimming in a pool of privilege and still face hardships in life. Many of you heard about the phrase "toxic masculinity," which is the concept of how a traditional male should behave based on society's expectations. The most common solution to this problem of "toxic masculinity" is to get rid of it, but that is of no help.

This concept of "toxic masculinity" starts as early as grade school, with boys getting harsher punishments than their female counterparts. Why is this the case though? According to the book, "Reaching Boys, Teaching Boys: Strategies That Work and Why," boys are far more likely than girls to get expelled from preschool, get diagnosed for learning disorders and attention problems, and are less likely to do homework. This type of observance plays a role in the teacher's grading criteria which is more biased toward behavior than academics.

Schools have to realize that boys and girls aren't the same when it comes to learning. Girls are more interested in fiction, magazines, and poetry while boys are more interested in comics and nonfiction. School libraries should be more supplied with this type of literature, says Keith J. Topping, a professor at the University of Dundee in Scotland says.

This devaluing of masculinity continues on into higher education, with young men enrolling at college at a much lower rate. There is also a notion that "rape culture" is running rampant on college campuses which have led to the hostility of these young men attending their respective institutions. The same young men are brought before a campus judiciary committee, who were educated by this thought of "rape culture," and are named openly while being charged with rape, despite the lack of corroboration. In some cases, due process is nonexistent and if found guilty can lead to a life-long smear of lies.

When it comes to proving this heinous crime, there are often two sides of the story, Side A and Side B. It can be possible that one or both of the sides can be deceptive toward authorities and these same authorities, in some cases, have to depend on word of mouth due to the lack of physical evidence.

This idea of "toxic masculinity" is a method used by third wave radical feminists to undermine the hardships that men and boys often experience. If a man has no masculinity, then he will not stop the man that is wicked and has too much masculinity. You can't remove the aggression, violence, and ambition from the male psyche if you tried. If harnessed properly it can lead to war and tyranny ending, building businesses and economies, and family and community support.

Men are our providers and protectors, and we need to acknowledge this day that celebrates what our husbands, fathers, brothers, and sons, go through on a daily basis and the much more difficult adversities they have to endure. So the next time when you underestimate a man's worth, remember that he has feelings of his own and that he's ready to put his life on the line to protect you and the people you care about. Happy International Men's Day.

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