This all started with a question. That question was "Do you have a boyfriend?". No, this wasn't someone trying to ask me out on a date, or someone who was interested in me, it was from someone who was there to help me. I had gotten out of class, and when I tried to start my car, everything was dead. Panicking, I called my insurance and they sent a truck out to jump start my car, so I could bring it to a shop if needed. When the guy showed up, we popped the hood and he realized that there were just a few parts that were lose and not connecting the battery to my car. He searched his car for his wrench and found that he had left it in another work vehicle. He came back to me and asked the question. "Do you have a boyfriend?" I answered "Yeah, I do, why", and his response was this:
"Call him and have him bring his toolkit to fix your car for you"
I looked at him, puzzled. I told him that I had my own tool kit and I could fix it myself. He responded with a scoff and that "it might be easier if I had my boyfriend fix it for me". That made my blood boil. He said "Okay, your car is started, drive safe!" and left me in the parking lot still in utter shock of what just happened. I love my boyfriend, and I have no doubt that he could tighten those parts in my car. But the sheer fact that a grown man assumed that I should have a man fix my car shows how utterly chauvinistic some people can be.
I have had a toolkit since I have started college. Yes, it is a full toolkit full of everything I need. Out of my friends I am probably the most handy and have built desks, tv stands, and shelves for them when asked. I also know how to sew, and fix most things that are broken. He most likely assumed that since I am a college age girl with long hair, wearing makeup, and driving a yellow Volkswagen Beetle, that I am inept to do most things. I know many peers of mine that have similar skills and face ridicule because of being female. Of course I can't fix everything, I do not have skills with certain things, and I do ask for help when needed. Obviously since a person came out to jump start my car I am not perfect. No one is perfect. But in a society where women are still stigmatized as "damsels in distress", it's hard to make yourself be self sufficient.
To quote Meg from Hercules:
"I'm a damsel, I'm in distress, I can handle it"
Oh and also, I fixed my own damn car.
