Time for some real talk.
It can be overwhelmingly easy to become emotionally responsible for people you care about. I know for me it took years to establish healthy emotional boundaries.
Constantly, I found myself in a pit with others, trying to help fix the problems that were projected onto me, all the while these same people would choose not to move forward, and often times drained my time, emotions, and energy with negativity and criticism.
However, as a Christian, I found myself feeling guilty if I did not run back to the same toxic acquaintances and friendships, because I felt like I HAD to FIX the hurt and heal the holes that truly could only be filled by Jesus.
My heart ached for these individuals because I desperately wanted them to feel the same joy and fullness that I had come to feel in the Lord, and to let go of the negative mindsets that were constantly indulged in.
I felt like a failure when I told others “no” for the sake of my own mental and emotional health, and soon enough I found myself in a rabbit hole I could barely crawl out of and felt constantly criticized because of it by the very people I was pouring out to.
I felt like I wasn’t enough because I couldn’t fix these problems, although all the while God was using this season of my life to strengthen me and show me the ONLY individual who can carry the weight of Human hurt and not break; Jesus Christ.
Our job is not to SAVE people, but to point them back to the SAVIOR, Jesus. And in that, you are not entitled to carry the weight when others try to project their emotions onto you. You have the choice and the ability to not allow someone else’s problems, frustrations, disappointments, and insecurities influence your life and your own personal joy.
Clap for yourself even when others do not. Love on everyone you come across. Celebrate others victories and successes. Encourage everyone you come across, but be VERY aware of who YOU allow to influence your mind and emotions.
Not everyone around you will understand you, and not everyone you pour into will want to progress into a positive mentality; so do not beat yourself up over something you have zero control over.
God calls us to love, not to save. That is His job.
In order to love people correctly, and to pour into them you have to take care of yourself, and be aware of who you allow to speak into YOUR life.
Do not allow your personal and intimate space to be influenced by destructive negativity spurred by discontentment and frustration. Stay kind to those who do so, but do not be fearful in separating yourself from toxic friendships, relationships and acquaintances, and rather allow God to take complete control of the situation.
They, as much as you, have a choice on what is allowed to manifest in the heart and in the mind. Choose joy. Choose contentment in Christ. Choose forgiveness. Choose confidence every day. Choose Jesus.