Why me, God? This is a question I find myself asking all too often. I question His plan and try to convince myself (and even God sometimes) that it wasn't supposed to be like this. Whether it is something small such as a test grade I swore I aced or a life changing situation such as heartbreak, death, or anything in between, I can't help but ask why these bad things happen in my life. But you know what? He is still good.
I exhaust myself trying to plan for the future. I'll be the first to admit that the majority of my anxiety comes from predicting and planning for the unknown. While to a certain point that can be beneficial, in the end it never goes as planned. I think that's something we all can relate to. I plan for five, ten years from now when in reality, I don't even know what tomorrow holds. That's when God's plan has to triumph past, present, and future plans. Although I'm far from fully understanding His plan, I'm learning to take it day by day, trusting in Him, because He is still good.
I came across a song the other day, and the chorus has been embedded in my mind ever since. It's so simple yet carries so much weight and meaning: "Thy will be done." If we truly took the time to pause in the midst of our hectic schedules and lifestyles, we would realize the peace that short phrase can bring. If you're a visual person like me, write it on your mirror, or set it as your phone's wallpaper, write it on your school notebooks. Although I believe it in my heart, my mind needs to be reminded sometimes that He is still good.
It's great when our plans do work out though, right? We feel a since of victory and ownership over our lives. Like we're the ones in control because it's how we envisioned things to be. It's ironic that we immediately turn to God when we need something, whether it is comfort, bravery, a good test score, or that cute boy. But we rarely take time to praise Him when things do go "our" way. Why isn't it we immediately turn to Him when those things do happen? We care more about turning to our friends and social media right away, when it's really God who deserves the credit.
With all of this in mind, where do we go from here? As God takes you from one door to the other, praise him in the hallway. Understand that life happens - things that are so heartbreaking you just can't see beyond them.
"God, this wasn't my plan." Pray instead, "God, this wasn't how I imagined things to be, but I trust with all of my heart that your plan will prevail. You are my Rock and I can't wait to witness the plans you have for me. Thank you for loving me and for steering me to where I need to be, even though I don't understand now. Because if not, You are still good."
If you want to listen to the powerful song I mentioned, click here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PAmh3yvmzXs
