No one said life was going to be easy. No one told us that each day was going to be smooth sailing. When life gets hard, it weighs us down and can be excruciatingly difficult to carry. The weight of the world can feel so intense pressing on your shoulders that you are left at a loss for breath and a loss for direction. The thing about the weight of the world is this: you aren't supposed to carry it alone.
Nobody is perfect. We all have flaws, weaknesses, and a history. There is no one that has come to where they stand without imperfection and hardship. It also makes it hard to feel not alone in our pains when the only thing we see on social media is highlights of people's lives, which are virtually all fun, exciting, and positive. The paradox about all of the great things we see via this medium is that it gives us very little insight as to who they truly are as people. We learn the most about others through that which they struggle with most. So why do we have this fear to allow others to help us carry our burdens? Why are we hesitant to let the weight of the world be shared?
I believe it boils down to vulnerability. Vulnerability is not comfortable and can be absolutely terrifying. It is something that is constantly a struggle in my own life. Nobody wants to seem weak or unable to do things on their own, but when we tighten our grip on pride and close ourselves off, we lose the potential to create meaningful, lasting bonds. As humans, we often thrive most in community environments. But what good is the space of a community if it's just a bunch of people interacting from a surface-level existence?
Allow yourself to authentically be seen by others, not just what is "status worthy." I mean allow yourself to be really, truly, deeply seen, flaws and all. When you give others the chance to love you and connect with you for all of you and not just the "good" parts, the possibilities for love become limitless. Allow yourself to be vulnerable. For it is only when you are vulnerable that others can help you carry the weight of the world. When I reflect on my life thus far and reminisce on the times I felt most connected to those around me, it wasn't the times when I was trying to appear a certain way or express all of the awesome things that I'm involved in. I think back to the moments when I let the walls crumble and was vulnerable about my struggles and pains. The moments I felt most loved were when I decided to allow myself the chance to be loved and the moments when I loved others in a place of real vulnerability.
There is so much growth in hardships. In fact, struggles are where the most immense growing thrives. It is only through the tears and tribulation that we have little choice but to face the wall of vulnerability and dive into the challenge of breaking it down to allow for real connection with one another. Vulnerability, as Brene Brown says in her profound TED talk, "The Power of Vulnerability," is the core of our struggles with fear and worthiness, but is the gateway to joy, love and belonging.
We are meant to carry one another's burdens. Love means sharing the burden of life's hardships with each other and walking together in the difficulties that come with the human experience. Nobody can carry the weight of the world alone, but that's why we have each other. You just have to be open enough to allow that weight to be shared.
