Greek life has been around for almost two hundred years. Those couple hundred years mean lots and lots of traditions, some by national fraternities or sororities, some by specific chapters.
One tradition that seemed to be a Greek-wide staple was the lavalier. However, it seems the move to the 21st century and the loss of actual "dating" has made it fall off the map.
It's been put aside for so long now most people in Greek life don't even know what a lavalier is or what it means to be lavaliered, which is so sad.
As a hopeless (and Greek) romantic as well as someone who loves tradition, I felt the need to try to resuscitate such a beautiful and time-honored custom.
Let me start by explaining what a lavalier is and what it means to be lavaliered. A lavalier is a necklace that bears the letters of a fraternity or sorority. This has become more of a fashion statement for sorority women, who buy lavaliers of their sorority letters. However, to be lavaliered is a whole different ball game than just buying a necklace and wearing it. Lavaliering is the act of a fraternity man presenting his significant other (usually a sorority woman) with a lavalier of his letters. It symbolizes a strong commitment and love, and is usually accompanied by a ceremony by the fraternity and sometimes the sorority.
So, now that the definition of the noun and verb versions of lavalier have been cleared up, let's go deeper into the meaning of it. Lavaliering has been and is a very big deal. A fraternity man is basically opening up his membership to his fraternity, which is something so meaningful as most men take their membership and the fraternity in general very seriously. It is a sign of true, long-term commitment. Sometimes, lavaliering is even considered to be a "pre-engagement" event, a sign that the couple is so committed and in love, that they will most likely end up married at some point. Personally, I feel this idea is the reason for the disconnect and push back of the lavalier.
But it seems like everyone my age has commitment phobia when it comes to relationships. People see each other for months and refuse to put labels on anything. They like someone but don't want to lose the so-called freedom of being single.
In plain terms, we're basically just a "hook-up" generation.
So, the idea of committing to someone in such a concrete way, like lavaliering, probably scares a lot of Greek life members. However, traditions can evolve a little with time, and this includes lavaliering. The meaning of the lavalier can be whatever you and your partner want it to be.
You know you want to be with this person forever and marry them? Make it a sign that the ring is going to come in time.
You love each other and want to commit but aren't entirely sure about the whole "pre-engagement" thing due to age, beliefs or other reasons? Use it as simply a sign of love and commitment to each other.
Lavaliering can be a symbol/have a meaning of whatever you and your partner want it to be. However, make sure you both discuss what it means to the both of you—there's nothing worse than having two people in different places with something that can have multiple symbolisms like this.
The ceremony, symbolism and meaning of the lavalier is a beautiful thing. It is something that can bring two people and even two houses together. The romance and love the lavalier holds has and always will transcend time. It may be a weaker, lesser-known tradition now, but it will always be there.
And who knows, maybe someday, us Millenials will get over our fear of commitment and realize how rewarding something like this can be.
A girl can always dream.
