A Breakdown of Bachelor Mondays
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A Breakdown of Bachelor Mondays

Welcome to the most dramatic season yet.

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A Breakdown of Bachelor Mondays
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It’s that time of year again, rain is falling, temperatures are low, and Ben H is the Bachelor. Hallelujah. So, as the season gets started, I thought I’d take a quick look at the anatomy of the “Bachelor Night.”

First off, you need the right atmosphere for the viewing. Grab yourself some tea or wine, find all your blankets and fluffy socks, and get cozy.

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Now comes the time to watch the promo of what Chris Harrison will undoubtedly call “the most dramatic season yet," which will get all your emotions going right off the bat.

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After Chris does his spiel, the Bachelor is shown in his "natural habitat" which usually involves either taking a dramatic walk down a pier or playing some sort of sport.

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Next come the limos. Time to pick your favorites and the girls that you hate, cause you know you will right from the beginning.

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Then there are the girls who present themselves in the most ridiculous way they can possibly think of to leave an impression. Like the girl who pulled out a tie because she was obsessed with "50 Shades of Grey."

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All the crazies will reveal themselves soon enough. First off is the season’s villain, who will most likely start drama the second she steps out of that limo.

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Then there are the girls who are actually crazy. Don’t get me wrong, Ashley S was one of my favorites, but there was a screw loose with that one.

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When the date card arrives, everyone not on the card gets mopey and starts wondering "why not me."

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The dreaded group date involves all kinds of cattiness, as is expected when seven girls are forced to go on a date with one guy. Duh.

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Some amazingly extravagant and romantic dates will be had, that involve major cuteness overload. So be prepared for that.

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Finally comes the cocktail party. Claws come out at this point, if they haven’t already. Girls will start stealing the Bachelor away mid-conversation, death glares will be made, and interviews will include a lot of venting about how “like, she’s not even here for the right reasons, like, you know?”

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Then the pivotal rose ceremony. The slow, melodic music will play at various speeds according to the intensity of the situation, and your emotions will be all over the place. Of course, there’s always a commercial break to be expected right before the last rose is handed out.

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Then begin the tears over how crushed these girls are over a guy they met a few weeks ago.

Lastly, we come full circle as the promo for the next episode comes on and you’re already hyped for next week the second the credits roll. But then you realize you've gotta wait a whole week before the next Bachelor party.

Get ready for another season of drama, Bachelor Nation. Because this one will be the best one yet...right?

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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