If you're anything like me, you did not get the best reaction when you told people you were planning to go to college with your girlfriend/boyfriend. There's a certain image that comes into peoples' minds that you're following them and that you cant make decisions on your own. I don't agree with this stereotype at all. Now, if you got into the college of your dreams and decide to go to the dumpy school that he's going to, that's another story. You should do what's best for yourself and your education, it could determine your career. But, if you and your other half have two or three schools that you cannot decide on, and you happen to have one in common, why not go there?
It can get tricky at times but there are ways to work through it and even avoid these problems all together. I've survived my first year at college with my boyfriend and we're still as happy as we were on move in day in August. It IS possible and it won't be "the worst mistake of your life." (I heard that phrase a lot.)
When you first arrive at college it's nice to have someone to eat lunch with those first couple weeks before you get to know people. It's a scary time and it was so helpful to have a familiar face going through the same things that I was. Just be careful not to cling too much. Every night does not need to be a sleepover. Although you find it new and exciting to be able to do this now, it does not need to be an every night occurrence. This is how fights arise. You're already living in a shoe-box-sized room with another person, you don't need to try and squeeze yourself in that room too. Every now and then is okay. I've found it's good to set days of the week allowed for sleepovers (usually non-school nights).
Be sure to find your own friends that are not affiliated with your boyfriend/girlfriend. It's easy to fall into hanging out as a group with them in it, and that's fine, just be sure to have some people you can hangout with or go to eat with at least once a day. You need other human interaction.
With college comes the party scene. You need to be okay with you having a girls night and him having a guys night. If you can't trust them to go out without you when you're at the same school, you have got some bigger fish to fry. If you're the one going out, be sure to send updates like, "I got to the party okay," or "I got home okay," just to ease their mind a little. Please do not be the person who's sitting at a party constantly texting their significant other. On the other hand, don't be the one at home texting them consistently and trying to start fights because they aren't answering. Let them have their time with friends.
I've talked about giving space a lot but another big issue is making sure you still date. I know it sounds cheesy, but it is important. In a college dorm setup it's hard to ever be alone, you're always surrounded by people. You need to make sure that you eat a meal together or do special things on the weekend, just the two of you. Even if it is just walking downtown and getting a slice of pizza. You'd be surprised how great it feels to be alone after being surrounded by people all of the time.
So don't be afraid to pick a college with your high school sweetheart. It is not a nightmare, and it is not the worst decision of your life. Be strong when you tell your parents your decision because you may not get the most approving look. When you tell your friends your decision, be prepared for the scoffs about how it won't be as fun with them there. My advice to you is to stick to your guns and you will have a great college experience. Good luck to you all of the couples braving college!
