Too small.
Too big.
Too jiggly.
Too firm.
These are all complaints that girls make about their boobs, and they all make my heart just a little sad. I guess it's because if there is one thing you can't really change about your body without surgery, it's your boobs. It's possible to work out your arms and legs and abs, and even your butt. But your boobs are just your boobs; they're mostly made of adipose tissue so the chest exercises that work for guys don't really work for us. Truthfully, it kind of pisses me off that boys rate women so hard on their boobs when again, that is the one body part that can't be changed easily. Kudos to ass guys, I guess.
Anyways, in an attempt to be more body positive, I compiled a list of the advantages of small boobs, big boobs, and medium-sized boobs.
Why small boobs rock:
1. You have more options for bras and bathing suits.
You can choose to wear whatever bra you want, from a sports bra to a bralette to a push-up bra. It doesn't matter, because having good chest support isn't as crucial for you. As for bathing suits, you can also wear anything from a low support bandeau top to a pushup bikini!
2. You will never have to worry about sagging boobs.
Small boobs stand up on their own much more easily without a bra than large boobs.
3. You have more clothing options when it comes to high fashion.
The high fashion industry features mostly skinny, lanky models with flat chests. A lot of people don't have the chest and torso small enough to look like the high fashion models when wearing such clothing, but you do!
4. You don't even have to wear a bra!
Shirt or dress with a back cut out? A low V-neck? Can't find a bra to work wear with your outfit? You can go commando without a problem.
5. You are less likely to have back problems and breast cancer.
Large boobs such as D cups can weigh 15 to 23 pounds. With small boobs, it's easier to maintain good posture without your front weighing you down, so you are less likely to have back issues. Regarding breast cancer likelihood, it's easier to detect a lump with smaller breasts in self-exams because there are fewer layers to feel through.
Why big boobs rock:
1. Honestly, big boobs speak for themselves.
Can't find a necklace to wear with your outfit? Congrats, your boobs are your accessory. They're way more fun to look at.
2. They're also incredibly fun to play with.
If you play Pokemon, I like to think of big boobs like Dittos. They're squishy and moldable, so they're fun to play with and to be played with.
3. You can always fill out the bust line of a top or dress.
With your boobs, you will never have a problem holding up a strapless dress. You'll also never need to put extra padding in so you can fill in the bust line of an outfit.
4. Effortless cleavage.
What's a push-up bra when your boobs already have all the extra cups?
5. Large boobs are sexy, feminine and typically more attractive to men.
The modern goddess of curves, Adriana Lima.
The traditional Greek goddesses and pin-up girls from the '50s are all depicted with huge hooters. Large boobs are incredibly pillowy and soft and feminine. Usually men consider big boobs more attractive, but who actually cares about what men think?
Why medium-sized boobs rock too:
Medium-sized boobs -- now that's the category I fall into. Truthfully, the incredibly average size of my boobs are a daily reminder of how incredibly average I am as a person in general.
It was hard for me to come up with a list about why I appreciate medium-sized boobs, because they don't have the fashion versatility of small boobs or the sex appeal of big boobs. But body positivity is incredibly important, so here are the reasons why medium-sized boobs rock.
1. You don't have to deal with either of the struggles that ladies with small breasts or large breasts face.
You don't have to deal with posture problems, but there is still something there to show off.
2. You have by far the most clothing options.
You can still rock the low cut tops without looking too sexy like ladies with cantaloupes, and you can still fill out your dresses with less issues than girls with small boobs
3. Honestly, no one can really critique your boobs.
Of course, we shouldn't really be commenting on each other's breasts unless we have something nice to say. But truthfully, there really isn't anything bad to say about average sized boobs in the first place. They're not too small, and they're not too big. They're not too firm, and they're not too saggy.
4. Medium-sized boobs draw less attention.
There are times, often in the professional work world, when we want our boobs to incite less of a reaction. They're large enough to be feminine, but not so big that creepy businessmen are constantly checking out your honkers.
5. There's actually nothing wrong about being average.
I've always thought it was really funny how growing up, we all wanted to be the best at something and somehow fit in. As Dr. Seuss, the rap genius children's author, once said, "You have to be odd to be number one".
But in case you're still looking to fit in and be like most women, average-sized boobs are one way to do it.
Now that I've cranked out reasons for every type of woman to love her boobs, let's run the world girls!
