The "Melting Pot"! The great United States of America where you can be anything you want to be no matter your race, ethnicity, sexual orientation or religion with no discrimination! A place that where you can order more food than you need truly need! A place where things sound absolutely amazing on paper but we don't live up to these standards other people hold us to.
It is true that the United States is a melting pot and as a result you'd assume most races get along very well, with no form of discrimination towards them. A place where everyone lives in perfect harmony to make an amazing and healthy living environment but the real truth is people of different races don't interact as often as most expect. As a result their becomes a great divide and its very hard to befriend those of a different races because of the walls we as people put up. I'm fortunate enough to move past race and befriend so many people.
Being friends with people that aren't of my race has opened my eyes to a lot of things both positive and negative. Being the "black friend" that acts "white" is one thing I'm so used to hearing. It is offensive because it puts black people in this box of what we can and can't like. On the other side of things people of my own race throw me in the same category. Being "white" is this idea where speaking properly and being quiet rather than loud is a white person thing. Like certain things that aren't produced by my own culture is considered being white and too some people they believe.
My friends think that I'm the encyclopedia to all black culture and can distribute that lovely black card they want so bad. They think that if they know me and that we are close enough the "n" word is acceptable.The word itself leads to so much argument of who is allowed to use it but I am not your "get out of jail card" to use it by saying: "I have black friend so it's okay". My hair is different than yours but is not an open invitation to constantly touch it and make side comments like: "I wish I had black people hair".
Being the black friend in a predominately white group is just like being a friend in any other friendship until people constantly remind you that you are black. From the small "that's a black thing" to their parents questioning your background and saying something like: "I'm glad Suzy is expanding her group of friends and adding a little color". That little color I add is sometimes seen as a bad thing where if I go into a store, I'm the one being followed under the suspicion I'm going to steal something or cause a problem. Picking up a friend in their predominately white and richer neighborhood has gotten me stopped by police for suspicion and being in a place I don't belong.
Don't get me wrong, I love being the black friend in my group but I'm more than just my skin color. I like to be around people and not be constantly reminded of my skin color as if it is the only determining factor of who I truly am as a human being. So expand your friend group and get a black friend but respect them and don't use us as your scapegoat.
Sheetal Tadiparty
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