I think that everyone has heard that quote, "Family isn't always blood," about a million times. No matter how corny people think it is, a lot of people live by it and experience the meaning every day. When it comes to adoption, some people are confused about it.
"Are you sad that you didn't grow up with your real parents?"
"I'm so sorry that happened to you."
In my life, being adopted was probably the best thing that happened to me! And I know that's true for a lot of my other adopted friends. Some parts of the adoption process are sad; it can be really hard. But because of the hard parts of my adoption, I am more appreciative of my adopted parents every day.
I did have an adoption with a happy ending, but the road there was pretty unpleasant and sad sometimes. I wrote this piece after my twenty-first birthday was missed by someone who I thought would remember. I think everyone has experienced something like this where someone let them down. This is a third-person perspective of what happened, names have been changed, even though it's obvious who is who. The main point of writing this was to show that everyone goes through their individual struggle, but the best thing to do is try and turn the negatives into a positive experience. Thanks for listening, and I hope you enjoy.
Birthday
It was the morning of Renèe's 21st birthday. She got out of bed and started to get ready for the day. She went to breakfast with friends and would occasionally glance down at her phone. Eugene had always been the one to send her a card for her birthday. They were always sweet cards, usually those singing ones with cute animals on the front. It meant a lot to her that he actually put some effort in.
Renèe had not spoken to her birth mother, Claire, in a very long time. It had reached the year mark a long time ago, and she didn't know how to feel about that. It always puzzled her that a mother could live her daily life and not think about her first child. But then again, Renèe knew that she didn't know what Claire could be thinking. Maybe she thought about her every day; maybe she didn't. Renèe did hope for a birthday card this year, and she usually didn't expect a lot from Claire.
"She hasn't even called me yet, Mom." Renèe complained, as she called her adopted mother, Grace.
"She might later, honey. Don't give up hope just yet; the day isn't over." Renèe took her mother's advice and didn't fixate on it.
It had always felt like when Renèe was younger, Claire would disappear in and out of her life. Some months she would call, write letters, send emails or Facebook messages. Then there were those times where she wouldn't hear from Claire at all. It was confusing, but at some point Renèe stopped hoping for yearly contact with Claire, and tried to forget about it.
Renèe would receive one card from Eugene on her birthday, it would always be sweet and make her feel remembered and special. She would wait for a second card from Claire, and when she didn't receive it, just give up. Sometimes she would get a birthday card, other years it would be a Happy Halloween/Birthday Card. Even though her birthday was in September. At first it made her angry, but Renèe knew that being angry was just wasted energy. When she cares, she will care, Renèe had thought to herself. But she had been thinking that for years.
At the end of the day, when Renèe got back to her room, she finally looked at her phone. When she saw that she didn't have any missed calls, voicemails, texts or Facebook messages, her stomach did a little flip. Claire had a new life now, and the sad fact was that she was not in it. All Renèe could do was be thankful for the family she did have, and love them with all her heart.
