Throughout my life, there have been a lot of times where I needed to apologize to someone for how I acted, but I never did. There are still a handful of people who deserve sincere apologizes from me, and I hope that before I die I am able to give them the apologies they deserve. There is one person, however, that I need to come clean with, one person I need to apologize to right now, and that person is me.

Dear self,

I’m sorry I’m so hard on myself. I’m sorry I look in the mirror and can list off more flaws than I can things I like about myself. I’m sorry my mind constantly surrounds negative self-talk and that I always doubt myself. You are a beautiful person who is capable of so much, and I hope that one day you come to terms with this.

I’m sorry for all the harmful things I’ve done. I’m sorry for the way I’ve treated my body throughout the years – the lack of care I had for how my body was holding up and the nasty foods I mindlessly shoved down my throat. I hope that you are able to maintain a long, healthy life, even though I didn’t give you the best care.

I’m sorry that I constantly compare myself to others. There is no need to compete with others. I am myself, and I need to be the best me possible. I am unique and I need to accept this. If I am constantly competing with those around me, I will not improve as a person. Everyone is uniquely themselves and that is okay.

I’m sorry for surrounding myself with people who tear you down. It’s been hard for me to cut off toxic people. I’d rather suffer myself and have someone around me that isn’t good for me around me than hurt them by ending our relationship. I hope that I gain the courage to end these toxic relationships. I cannot grow otherwise.

I’m sorry for making irrelevant things a priority. I’ve spent a lot of my time caring about things that don’t matter in the long run. I’m sorry that I placed my focus on this when I should’ve taken that energy and placed it elsewhere. I’d be doing so much better if I focused on what was really important instead of placing my focus on irrelevant issues.

Lastly, I’m sorry I have to write this letter. I wish like everything I didn’t have to apologize to myself for the things that I’ve done. I wish I never did these things. Writing this letter to myself has opened up my eyes, and I hope this is the last time I’ll ever have to apologize to myself.

Love,