Best Lines From "The Office"

Here Are 192 Quotes From The 'The Office', And Every Single One Will Leave You 'Satisfied And Smiling'

Just the absolute best one-liners from the whole series.


"The Office" is one of the most well-known shows and has produced some of the best one-liners of any show. Here is every episode of "The Office" summarized with a one-liner from the episode.

1. Season 1, Episode 1: "Pilot".

10 Things You Missed in 'The Office' Pilot

"I guess the atmosphere that I've tried to create here is that I'm a friend first and a boss second, and probably an entertainer third." --Michael Scott

2. Season 1, Episode 2: "Diversity Day".

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"Abraham Lincoln once said that "If you're a racist, I will attack you with the North" and these are the principles I carry with me in the workplace."—Michael Scott

3. Season 1, Episode 3: "Health Care".

"And uh, well, if this were my career, I'd have to throw myself in front of a train."—Jim Halpert

4. Season 1, Episode 4: "The Alliance".

Pin by Krissy Johns on The Office | Pinterest | Office tv, Office tv show and The Office

"I'm trying to write something funny here, what am I going to do with a removed uterus?" —Michael Scott

5. Season 1, Episode 5: "Basketball".

The Office Basketball Episode. IN YOUR FACE - Create, Discover and Share Awesome GIFs on Gfycat

"God, this is so sad, this is the smallest amount of power I've ever seen go to someone's head." —Jim Halpert

6. Season 1, Episode 6: "Hot Girl".

Episode 6 – Hot Girl

"The purse girl hits everything on my checklist: creamy skin, straight teeth, curly hair, amazing breasts... not for me, for my children." —Dwight Schrute

7. Season 2, Episode 1: "The Dundies".

“The Dundies” takes the show out of the office, but not The Office out of the show

"It was the 05/05/05 party, it happens once every billion years." —Michael Scott

8. Season 2, Episode 2: "Sexual Harassment".

"You wouldn't arrest the guy who was just passing drugs from one guy to another." —Michael Scott

9. Season 2, Episode 3: "Office Olympics".

“Office Olympics”/“The Fire”

"This scented candle...andle...andle, that I found in the men's, represents the eternal burning of competition... or something." —Jim Halpert

10. Season 2, Episode 4: "The Fire".

Admit it, you just sang it in your mind. "Ryan started the fire." The Office. | The Office | Pinterest | The Office, The office ryan and Office memes

"Ryan started the fire, it was always burning since the world was turning!" —Dwight Schrute

11. Season 2, Episode 5: "Halloween".

"I'm guessing Angela is the one in the neighborhood that gives the trick-or-treaters toothbrushes." —Pam Beesly

12. Season 2, Episode 6: "The Fight".

Episode 12 – The Fight

"I want people to be afraid of how much they love me." —Michael Scott

13. Season 2, Episode 7: "The Client".

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"Chili's is the new golf course, it's where business happens." —Michael Scott

14. Season 2, Episode 8: "Performance Review".

"Well, last year my performance started with Michael asking me what my hopes and dreams were, and ended with him telling me he could bench press 190 pounds." —Pam Beesly

15. Season 2, Episode 9: "Email Surveillance".

"I would not miss it for the world, but if something else came up, I would definitely not go." —Michael Scott

16. Season 2, Episode 10: "Christmas Party".

Official Ranking of' The Office' Christmas Eps

"Well happy birthday Jesus, sorry your party's so lame." —Michael Scott

17. Season 2, Episode 11: "Booze Cruise".

"The word 'ship' is hidden in side the word 'leadership,' as its... derivation." —Michael Scott

18. Season 2, Episode 12: "The Injury".

"Today I got up, I stepped onto the grill and it clamped down on my foot." —Michael Scott

19. Season 2, Episode 13: "The Secret".

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"I will have a chicken breast, hold the chicken." —Michael Scott

20. Season 2, Episode 14: "The Carpet".

"I swore to myself if I ever got to walk around the room as manager, people would laugh as they saw me coming, and they'd applaud as I walked away." —Michael Scott

21. Season 2, Episode 15: "Boys and Girls".

Boys and Girls

"Why does society force us to use urinals when sitting down is far more comfortable?" —Michael Scott

22. Season 2, Episode 16: "Valentine's Day".

The Office GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY Giphy

"You can't fire me just because Michael isn't here, Dwight." —Pam Beesly

23. Season 2, Episode 17: "Dwight's Speech".

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"I can travel anywhere, except Cuba, and I will travel to New Zealand and walk the Lord of the Rings trail to Mordor and I will hike Mount Doom." —Dwight Schrute

24. Season 2, Episode 18: "Take Your Daughter to Work Day".

186 Days Of The Office - Day 23 (January 23rd) - S2E18: Take Your Daughter To Work Day

"Jesus could come through that door, he's not going to help you, if you don't stop sniffing after my child!" —Stanley Hudson

25. Season 2, Episode 19: "Michael's Birthday".

"It is 11:23 exactly, the exact moment, when you emerged from your mother's vaginal canal." —Dwight Schrute

26. Season 2, Episode 20: "Drug Testing".

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"This year, more people will use cocaine than will read a book to their children." —Michael Scott

27. Season 2, Episode 21: "Conflict Resolution".

Episode 27 – Conflict Resolution

"I sat at my desk all day with a rifle that shoots potatoes at sixty pounds per square inch." —Dwight Schrute

28. Season 2, Episode 22: "Casino Night".

Casino Night (2006)

"Thanks, I've never owned a refrigerator before." —Creed Bratton

29. Season 3, Episode 1: "Gay Witch Hunt".

Gay Witch Hunt

"Jim told me you could buy gay-dar online." –Dwight Schrute

30. Season 3, Episode 2: "The Convention".

The Convention (2006)

"Toby Flenderson is everything that is wrong with the paper industry." –Michael Scott

31. Season 3, Episode 3: "The Coup".

“The Coup”/“Grief Counseling”

"I know that patience and loyalty are good and virtuous traits but sometimes I just think you need to grow a pair." –Angela Martin

32. Season 3, Episode 4: "Grief Counseling".

"He's finished work, he's on his way home, WHAM, his cappa is detated from his head!" –Michael Scott

33. Season 3, Episode 5: "Initiation".


"Jan used to treat Michael like he was a ten-year-old, but lately, it's like he's five." –Pam Beesly

34. Season 3, Episode 6: "Diwali".

'The Office' episode 'Diwali' is still a master class in representation

"Lot of gods with unpronouncable names, twenty minutes later, you find out that it is essentially a Hindu Halloween." –Michael Scott

35. Season 3, Episode 7: "Branch Closing".

"The CFO is taking away my house and giving it to Josh and Josh is giving away the garage to Bob Vance." –Michael Scott

36. Season 3, Episode 8: "The Merger".

michael scott the office gif

"Dwight might have won the battle, but I will win...the next battle." –Andy Bernard

37. Season 3, Episode 9: "The Convict".

"The worst thing about prison was the dementors." –Michael Scott

38. Season 3, Episode 10: "A Benihana Christmas".

"It's a bold move to photoshop yourself into a picture with your girlfriend and her kids on a ski trip with their real father." –Jim Halpert

39. Season 3 , Episode 11: "Back from Vacation".

Episode 39 – Back from Vacation

"The Jamaicans don't have a word for 'impossible.'" –Michael Scott

40. Season 3, Episode 12: "Traveling Salesman".

THE OFFICE 3x13 - Traveling Salesman

"You know what they say, fool me once, strike one, but fool me twice... strike three." –Michael Scott

41. Season 3, Episode 13: "The Return".

“The Return”/“Ben Franklin”

"I am ready to face any challenges that might be foolish enough to face me." –Dwight Schrute

42. Season 3, Episode 14: "Ben Franklin".

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"Mr. Franklin, I would say you are probably one of the sexiest presidents ever." –Michael Scott

43. Season 3, Episode 15: "Phyllis's Wedding".

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" It's a big day for Phyllis, but it's an even bigger day for me, employer of the bride." –Michael Scott

44. Season 3, Episode 16: "Business School".

“Business School”

"Whenever I'm about to do something, I think, 'Would an idiot do that?' And if they would, I do not do that thing." –Dwight Schrute

45. Season 3, Episode 17: "Cocktails".


"Early worm gets the.. worm." –Michael Scott

46. Season 3, Episode 18: "The Negotiation".

The Office - The Negotiation | Comedy Central

"So I don't think that this is totally just a women's suit, at the very least it's bisexual." –Michael Scott

47. Season 3, Episode 19: "Safety Training".

Safety Training

"Dwight you ignorant slut!" –Michael Scott

48. Season 3, Episode 20: "Product Recall".

“Safety Training”/“Product Recall”

"Identity theft is not a joke, Jim!" –Dwight Schrute

49. Season 3, Episode 21: "Women's Appreciation".

Women's Appreciation - Wikipedia

"Sometimes the clothes at GAP Kids are just too flashy so I'm forced to go to the American Girl Store and order clothes for large, colonial dolls." –Angela Martin

50. Season 3, Episode 22: "Beach Games".

Episode 50 – Beach Games

"About forty times a year, Michael gets really sick but has no symptoms." –Pam Beesly

51. Season 3, Episode 23: "The Job".

"Daddy is Meryl Streep." –Michael Scott

52. Season 4, Episode 1: "Fun Run".

Fun Run (2007)

"One day Michael came in, complaining about a speed bump, on the highway... I wonder who he ran over then." —Jim Halpert

53. Season 4, Episode 2: "Dunder Mifflin Infinity"

Dunder Mifflin Infinity

"Where are the turtles?" —Michael Scott

54. Season 4, Episode 3: "Launch Party".

"I did so well last February that Corporate gave me two plaques in lieu of a pay raise." —Dwight Schrute

55. Season 4, Episode 4: "Money".

"I declare bankruptcy!" —Michael Scott

56. Season 4, Episode 5: "Local Ad".

On the Local Ad episode, what was Stanley's roll? - The Office Trivia Quiz

"I find the mystery genre disgusting, I hate being titillated." —Angela Martin

57. Season 4, Episode 6: "Branch Wars".

The Office - Branch Wars | Comedy Central

"The eye are the groin of the head." —Dwight Schrute

58. Season 4, Episode 7: "Survivor Man".

The Office - Survivor Man | Comedy Central

"It's better to get hurt by someone you know accidentally then by a stranger on purpose." —Dwight Schrute

59. Season 4, Episode 8: "The Deposition".

The Office - The Deposition | Comedy Central

"You expect to get screwed by your company, but you never expect to get screwed by your girlfriend." —Michael Scott

60. Season 4, Episode 9: "Dinner Party".

"Good luck paying me back on your zero dollars a month plus benefits salary, babe!" —Michael Scott

61. Season 4, Episode 10: "The Chair Model".

The Office - Chair Model | Comedy Central

"Hello Oscar Meyer Wiener -lover." —Michael Scott

62. Season 4, Episode 11: "Night Out".

The Office - Night Out | Comedy Central

" Oh my God, Mom I've gotta go one of my friends is getting beat up by some girls!" —Michael Scott

63. Season 4, Episode 12: "Did I Stutter?".

The Office - Did I Stutter? | Comedy Central

"It's just noise coming out of an ugly scientist."—Michael Scott

64. Season 4, Episode 13: "Job Fair".

The Office - Job Fair | Comedy Central

"So, I am about to do something very bold in this job that I've never done before: Try." —Jim Halpert

65. Season 4, Episode 14: "Goodbye Toby".


"The two levels being, welcome to Scranton and I love you." —Michael Scott

66. Season 5, Episode 1: "Weight Loss: Part 1".

The Office S5 E1 Weight Loss

"One more bite of eclair each, hold it in your mouth if you can't swallow it." —Dwight Schrute

67. Season 5, Episode 2: "Weight Loss: Part 2".

6 great Jim and Pam moments that aren't 'Casino Night' or 'Niagara'

"Pam, will you marry me?" —Jim Halpert

68. Season 5, Episode 3: "Business Ethics".

The Office S5 E2 Business Ethics

"When I discovered YouTube, I didn't work for five days." —Michael Scott

69. Season 5, Episode 4: "Baby Shower".

The Office - Baby Shower | Comedy Central

"If a baby were president, there would be no taxes, there would be no war." —Michael Scott

70. Season 5, Episode 5: "Crime Aid".

The Office - Crime Aid | Comedy Central

"So much for sex without consequences." —Michael Scott

71. Season 5, Episode 6: "Employee Transfer".

The Office - Employee Transfer | Comedy Central

"If I had to put Dwight's chances into a percentage, I would say he has none percent chance." —Andy Bernard

72. Season 5, Episode 7: "Customer Survey".

The Office - Customer Survey | Comedy Central

"Buttlicker, our prices have never been lower!" —Dwight Schrute

73. Season 5, Episode 8: "Business Trip".

The Office - Business Trip | Comedy Central

"A concierge is the Winnipeg equivalent of a geisha." —Michael Scott

74. Season 5, Episode 9: "Frame Toby".

"Since when is it illegal to put caprese salad anywhere?"—Michael Scott

75. Season 5, Episode 10: "The Surplus".

THE OFFICE: The Surplus

"Look, I really need this new chair. I mean, seriously, how is it possible that in five years I've had two engagement rings, and only one chair?" —Pam Beesly

76. Season 5, Episode 11: "Moroccan Christmas".

Moroccan Christmas (2008)

"What is going to happen when you come into work and you're dead?" —Michael Scott

77. Season 5, Episode 12: "The Duel".

The Duel (2009)

"Rule 17: Don't turn your back on bears, men you have wronged, or the dominant turkey during mating season."—Dwight Schrute

78. Season 5, Episode 13: "Prince Family Paper".

Prince Family Paper (2009)

"A painting, can be beautiful, but I don't want to bang a painting." —Kevin Malone

79. Season 5, Episode 14: "Stress Relief: Part 1".

Stress Relief (2009)

"You are black, Stanley!" —Michael Scott

80. Season 5, Episode 15: "Stress Relief: Part 2".

Stress Relief (2009)

"Stanley, you crush your wife during sex and your heart sucks." —Michael Scott

81. Season 5, Episode 16: "Lecture Circuit: Part 1".

Lecture Circuit: Part 1 (2009)

"Fortunately my feelings regenerate at twice the speed of a normal man's." —Dwight Schrute

82. Season 5, Episode 17: "Lecture Circuit: Part 2".

Lecture Circuit: Part 2 (2009)

"Jabba the Hut, Pizza the Hut, fat guys like pizza, pepperoni pizza-- pepperoni Tony!" —Michael Scott

83. Season 5, Episode 18: "Blood Drive".

Blood Drive (2009)

"Feel a little lopsided becasue of all the blood they took out of my right side." —Dwight Schrute

84. Season 5, Episode 19: "Golden Ticket".

Golden Ticket (2009)

"Put your heart out there like that, it's liable to just turn into this blackened carbon brick where it has barbecue sauce of shame and rage and two hot people with a perfect relationship would not understand that!" —Andy Bernard

85. Season 5, Episode 20: "New Boss".

New Boss (2009)

"Truth be told, I think I thrive under a lack of accountability." —Michael Scott

86. Season 5, Episode 21: "Two Weeks".

Two Weeks (2009)

"Any really good headhunter will storm your village at sunset with overwhelming force and cut off your head with a ceremonial knife." —Dwight Schrute

87. Season 5, Episode 22: "Dream Team".

Dream Team (2009)

"I mean I've always subscribed to the idea that if you really want to impress your boss, you go in there and you do mediocre work, half-heatedly." —Jim Halpert

88. Season 5, Episode 23: "The Michael Scott Paper Company".

Michael Scott Paper Company (2009)

"When I saw you talking to Erin earlier, I noticed that your pupils dilated and your skin flushed and I'm assuming, a little bit of blood rushed into your penis." —Dwight Schrute

89. Season 5, Episode 24: "Heavy Competition".

Heavy Competition (2009)

"IT's like a girl says she'll make out with you but then her boyfriend is waiting around the corner with a pee-filled balloon." —Michael Scott

90. Season 5, Episode 25: "Broke".

Episode 87 – Broke

"Ever since I've gotten clean there's something about fresh morning air that... just really makes me sick." —Ryan Howard

91. Season 5, Episode 26: "Casual Friday".

Casual Friday (2009)

"This is awkward to talk about but there may or may not be but definitely is a mutiny forming in the warehouse right now." —Jim Halpert

92. Season 5, Episode 27: "Cafe Disco".

Cafe Disco (2009)

"It is a daytime disco on the ground floor of an industrial office building." —Michael Scott

93. Season 5, Episode 28: "Company Picnic".

Company Picnic (2009)

"Michael ate an entire, family-sized chicken pot pie for lunch and then he promptly fell asleep so we're all trying to be very quiet so as to not wake him up before 5pm." —Jim Halpert

94. Season 6, Episode 1: "Gossip".

Gossip (2009)

"Who's been saying there's another person inside of me, working me with controls!?" —Kevin Malone

95. Season 6, Episode 2: "The Meeting".

The Meeting (2009)

"Here you will find here a cheddar-style spread, which has reacted nicely with the air to form a light rind, which I believe you will find both challenging and delicious." —Andy Bernard

96. Season 6, Episode 3: "The Promotion".

The Promotion (2009)

"Con, you unzip your pants and you find that there's a calculator down there." —Michael Scott

97. Season 6, Episode 4: "Niagara : Part 1".

Niagara: Part 1 (2009)

"It's after midnight, you're married!" —Michael Scott

98. Season 6, Episode 5: "Niagara: Part 2".

Niagara: Part 2 (2009)

"And Plan A was marrying her a long, long time ago; pretty much the day I met her." —Jim Halpert

99. Season 6, Episode 6: "Mafia".

The ‘Office’ Has Not Jumped The Shark

"Push free plate 'till tomorrow morning." —Michael Scott

100. Season 6, Episode 7: "The Lover".

The Lover (2009)

"Don't call my mother your lover!" —Pam Halpert

101. Season 6, Episode 8: "Koi Pond".

Episode 97 – Koi Pond

"I'm not usually the butt of the joke, I'm usually the face of the joke." —Michael Scott

102. Season 6, Episode 9: "Double Date".

Double Date (2009)

"Can't a guy just buy some bagels for his friends so they'll owe him a favor which he can use to get someone fired who stole a co-manager position from him anymore?" —Dwight Schrute

103. Season 6, Episode 10: "Murder".

Murder (2009)

"One of the battles that I picked was to stop Michael from running plastic tubes all over the office and placing hamsters inside of them." —Jim Halpert

104. Season 6, Episode 11: "Shareholder Meeting".

Shareholder Meeting (2009)

"If onlys and justs were candies and nuts, then everyday would be un de donkfest!" —Dwight Schrute

105. Season 6, Episode 12: "Scott's Tots".

Scott's Tots (2009)

"I have made some empty promises in my life but, hands down that was the most generous." —Michael Scott

106. Season 6, Episode 13: "Secret Santa".

Secret Santa (2009)

"You can't yell out 'I need this I need this' as you pin down an employee on your lap." —Jim Halpert

107. Season 6, Episode 14: "The Banker".

The Banker (2010)

"The principles that I'm applying to the office are the same ones that made Lady Gaga a star." —Michael Scott

108. Season 6, Episode 15: "Sabre".

Sabre (2010)

"Gabe seems tall, hope we get along." —Michael Scott

109. Season 6, Episode 16: "Manager and Salesman".

Manager and Salesman (2010)

"They love a good crotch." —Jo Bennett

110. Season 6, Episode 17: "Delivery: Part 1".

The Delivery: Part 1 (2010)

"Pregnant Pam and I, we get hungry at the same times so we've been eating together a lot." —Kevin Malone

111. Season 6, Episode 18: "Delivery: Part 2".

The Delivery: Part 2 (2010)

"Wrong baby, this is not our baby!" —Pam Halpert

112. Season 6, Episode 19: "St. Patrick's Day".

St. Patrick's Day (2010)

"It is the closest that the Irish will ever get to Christmas." —Michael Scott

113. Season 6, Episode 20: "New Leads".

New Leads (2010)

"Stop sexting Pam, I'm trying to congratulate you." —Michael Scott

114. Season 6, Episode 21: "Happy Hour".

Happy Hour (2010)

"And I'm like I'll call this a deck if it'll make you happy but this is just a porch without a roof." —Darryl Philbin

115. Season 6, Episode 22: "Secretary's Day".

Episode 110 – Secretary’s Day

"In the foster home my hair was my room." —Erin Hannon

116. Season 6, Episode 23: "Body Language".

Episode 111 – Body Language

"If you'd have told me this morning that today I'd be creating a monster capable of my own destruction, I'd have thought you were referring to the bull Mose and I are trying to reanimate." —Dwight Schrute

117. Season 6, Episode 24: "The Cover Up".

'The Office' finale plot revealed in 'The Cover-Up'

"The only logical way to find out if Donna is a cheater is to seduce her, bring her to orgasm, then call Michael and tell him the sad news." —Dwight Schrute

118. Season 6, Episode 25: "The Chump".

michael scott steve carell gif

"You say radon is silent but deadly and then you expect me not to make farting noises with my mouth?" —Michael Scott

119. Season 6, Episode 26: "Whistleblower".

• the office michael scott screencap whistleblower eatpizzas •

"My mind is going a mile an hour." —Michael Scott

120. Season 7, Episode 1: "Nepotism".

Evan Peters Online | Photo Gallery: Click image to close this window

"I've got fifty six ounces of fluid in my bladder, and we have to establish a pee corner!" —Dwight Schrute

121. Season 7, Episode 2: "Counseling".

The Office: "Counseling"

"I talk a lot so I've learned to just tune myself out." —Kelly Kapoor

122. Season 7, Episode 3: "Andy's Play".

Episode 117 – Andy’s Play

"Why are you dressed like a seed cataloge model?" —Dwight Schrute

123. Season 7, Episode 4: "Sex Ed".

Episode 118 – Sex Ed

"Well, he had no arms or legs, and he couldn't see, hear or speak... and that's how he led a nation." —Michael Scott

124. Season 7, Episode 5: "The Sting".

"I take spinning classes, three times a month, I think I know how to ride a bike." —Michael Scott

125. Season 7, Episode 6: "Costume Contest".

Episode 120 – The Costume Contest

"Halloween should be a day in which we honor monsters and not be mad at each other." —Michael Scott

126. Season 7, Episode 7: "Christening".

Episode 121 – Christening

"It's not just a day for Jim and Pam, or for the baby, or for me." —Michael Scott

127. Season 7, Episode 8: "Viewing Party".

"Well, I think "enemy" is a strong word, because I think we have a really charming back and forth." —Jim Halpert

128. Season 7, Episode 9: "".

The Office: ""

"Toby is the instruction card you throw away." —Michael Scott

129. Season 7, Episode 10: "China".

The Office: "China"

"Don't get me started on how coddled the modern anus is." —Dwight Schrute

130. Season 7, Episode 11: "Classy Christmas: Part 1".

The Nook channels Dunder Mifflin for an 'Office' Classy Christmas party

"How do you describe somebody who is at the same time an old friend, and was a lover, and was a complicated part of my past, and maybe, just maybe, a part of my future?" —Michael Scott

131. Season 7, Episode 12: "Classy Christmas: Part 2".

"In the end, the greatest snowball isn't a snowball at all, it's fear." —Dwight Schrute

132. Season 7, Episode 13: "The Ultimatum".

The Office: "Ultimatum"

"And nobody talks me down like myself in a video talking me down." —Michael Scott

133. Season 7, Episode 14: "The Seminar".

The Office: "The Seminar"

"There's a 'Shrek 2'?" —Erin Hannon

134: Season 7, Episode 15: "The Search".

The Office

"Space Orphan and Princess Nincompoop are off to rescue Michael!" —Dwight Schrute

135: Season 7, Episode 16: "PDA".

The Office: "PDA"

"Holly and I are like Romeo and Juliet, and the office is like the dragon that kept them apart." —Michael Scott

136. Season 7, Episode 17: "Threat Level Midnight".

"Threat Level Midnight"

"Joke's on you Goldenface, that man was a wanted animal rapist." —Michael Scott

137. Season 7, Episode 18: "Todd Packer".

Todd Packer (episode)

"I have very little patience for stupidity." —Kevin Malone

138. Season 7, Episode 19: "Garage Sale".

Garage Sale (2011)

"Holly Flax, marrying me will you be?" —Michael Scott

139. Season 7, Episode 20: "Training Day".

Training Day (2011)

"Now I'm going to have to go online and look at turtles or else I'm going to be off the whole day." —Michael Scott

140. Season 7, Episode 21: "Michael's Last Dundies".

Michael's Last Dundies (2011)

"Um, I wanna dedicate this award to something that uh... we take for granted in our daily lives, and that is the humble trash can." —Dwight Schrute

141. Season 7, Episode 22: "Goodbye, Michael".

Goodbye, Michael (2011)

"T-Shirt idea, goodbyes stink." —Michael Scott

142. Season 7, Episode 23: "The Inner Circle".

The Inner Circle (2011)

"Uh oh, this former Administrative Assistant misspelled "Administrative" and "Assistant"." —Jim Halpert

143. Season 7, Episode 24: "Dwight K. Schrute, (Acting) Manager".

Dwight K. Schrute, (Acting) Manager (2011)

"Gabe was a great guy with so many wonderful qualities, but it was a challenge being touched by him." —Erin Hannon

144. Season 7, Episode 25: "Search Committee: Part 1".

Search Committee (2011)

"Bread is the paper of the food industry." —Dwight Schrute

145. Season 7, Episode: "Search Committee: Part 2".

Search Committee (2011)

"No, I want you to say that you think the best person to be our new manager is a homeless person." —Pam Halpert

146. Season 8, Episode 1: "The List".

The List (2011)

"It might be easier if you take a deep breath, lift from the knees... And shove it up your butt!" —Stanley Hudson

147. Season 8, Episode 2: "The Incentive".

The Incentive (2011)

"There's something about an underdog that really inspires the unexceptional." —Robert California

148. Season 8, Episode 3: "Lotto".

Lotto (2011)

"They're is more of a, physical intelligence." —Dwight Schrute

149. Season 8, Episode 4: "Garden Party".

Garden Party (2011)

"You don't need a reason to throw a garden party anymore than you need a reason to throw a birthday party." —Andy Bernard

150. Season 8, Episode 5: "Spooked".

Spooked (2011)

"And every year, he says the same thing: "As soon as I get my weapons back, I'm gonna kill you."" —Toby Flenderson

151. Season 8, Episode 6: "Doomsday".

Doomsday (2011)

"I'm gonna tell you her last name tomorrow, because she's gonna be screaming it tonight." —Gabe Lewis

152. Season 8, Episode 7: "Pam's Replacement".

Pam's Replacement (2011)

"I can't impregnate you, and that's the driving force between male-female attraction." —Dwight Schrute

153. Season 8, Episode 8: "Gettysburg".

Gettysburg (2011)

"Robert you've got your sheep, and your black sheep, and I'm not even a sheep, I'm on the freaking moon." —Ryan Howard

154. Season 8, Episode 9: "Mrs. California".

Mrs. California (2011)

"I want you to bring that same buffalo wing passion to this gym." —Dwight Schrute

155. Season 8, Episode 10: "Christmas Wishes".

Christmas Wishes (2011)

"I would like another alcohol." —Erin Hannon

156. Season 8, Episode 11: "Trivia".

Trivia (2012)

"You're a perfectly fine toilet... I'm just an extraordinary piece of crap." —Dwight Schrute

157. Season 8, Episode 12: "Pool Party".

Pool Party (2012)

"The 1% are suffering too, people." —Robert California

158. Season 8, Episode 13: "Jury Duty".

Jury Duty (2012)

"You didn't prepare me for a big giant fat baby." —Kevin Malone

159. Season 8, Episode 14: "Special Project".

"My nickname was actually King Butt, because I had a king-sized butt. —Andy Bernard

160. Season 8, Episode 15: "Tallahassee".

The Office

"I was reading the mattress tag and I fell asleep." —Erin Hannon

161. Season 8, Episode 16: "After Hours".

The Office

"English peoples' main use today is judging American talent." —Dwight Schrute

162. Season 8, Episode 17: "Test the Store".

"Packer, you will be the sexual predator who has come to prey on the trendy teenage girls who are obsessed with the Pyramid." —Dwight Schrute

163. Season 8, Episode 18: "Last Day in Florida".

The Office

"Oh, I boiled some Gatorade." —Erin Hannon

164. Season 8, Episode 19: "Get the Girl".

"I think it's a cross between Dumbo and Jumbo, with a hint of chubby." —Jim Halpert

165. Season 8, Episode 20: "Welcome Party".

Welcome Party (2012)

"I really should have a tweeter account." —Dwight Schrute

166. Season 8, Episode 21: "Angry Andy".

"I'd rather her be alone than with somebody, is that love?" —Ryan Howard

167. Season 8, Episode 22: "Fundraiser".

The Office - Season 8

"I don't want to alarm people, but there is a distinct chance that we're all about to be killed." —Dwight Schrute

168. Season 8, Episode 23: "Turf War".

The Office - Season 8

"I'm the f****** Lizard King." —Robert California

169. Season 8, Episode 24: "Free Family Portrait Studio".

"You mean to tell me that no one wanted an energy drink for Asian homosexuals?" —Darryl Philbin

170. Season 9, Episode 1: "New Guys".

The Office - Season 9

"There are two things I am passionate about: recycling and revenge." —Andy Bernard

171. Season 9, Episode 2: "Roy's Wedding".

The Office - Season 9

"I give to a foundation that teaches homeless children nautical flag signaling." —Andy Bernard

172. Season 9, Episode 3: "Andy's Ancestry".

Andy's Ancestry (2012)

"Nellie, get your wrinkly old balls in here." —Andy Bernard

173. Season 9, Episode 4: "Work Bus".

Work Bus (2012)

"No nobies, no probies." —Dwight Schrute

174. Season 9, Episode 5: "Here Comes Treble".

Here Comes Treble (2012)

"I mean the pumpkin should rot off of my head in a month or two." —Dwight Schrute

175. Season 9, Episode 6: "The Boat".

The Boat (2012)

"This is gotcha journalism, but you know what, they're not going to gotch me." —Dwight Schrute

176. Season 9, Episode 7: "The Whale".

The Whale (2012)

"Smile if you love men's prostates." —Toby Flenderson

177. Season 9, Episode 8: "The Target".

The Target (2012)

"When she comes in, if she's cold and awkward and cruel to me, then great, it's business as usual —Oscar Martinez

178. Season 9, Episode 9: "Dwight Christmas".

Dwight Christmas (2012)

"I have to run to my car to take a dump." —Dwight Schrute

179. Season 9, Episode 10: "Lice".

Lice (2013)

"Scalp leeches, skull vampires, follicle gypsies, hair lawyers." —Dwight Schrute

180. Season 9, Episode 11: "Suit Warehouse".

Suit Warehouse (2013)

"Glistening brown morsels tumbling from every pouch in his trousers." —Dwight Schrute

181. Season 9, Episode 12: "Customer Loyalty".

Customer Loyalty (2013)

"I did everything but unzip their pants for them." —Nellie Burtrum

182. Season 9, Episode 13: "Junior Salesman".

Junior Salesman (2013)

"When I was young, I spent several years at a private school where I was told I would be taught to harness my mutant abilities." —Dwight Schrute

183. Season 9, Episode 14: "Vandalism".

Vandalism (2013)

"My fetish is signed drawing of butts." —Dwight Schrute

184. Season 9, Episode 15: "Couple's Discount".

Couples Discount (2013)

"So, I guess it's goodbye chunky, lemon milk." —Kevin Malone

185. Season 9, Episode 16: "Moving On".

Moving On (2013)

"Erin just dumped me and I can't remember any of the aha moments I had on the boat, and I know it sounds weird to say but really miss my beard." —Andy Bernard

186. Season 9, Episode 17: "The Farm".

The Farm (2013)

"I went caroling in March and I fertilized some bushes along the way." —Clark Green

187. Season 9, Episode 18: "Promos".

Promos (2013)

"This is a documentary?" —Kevin Malone

188. Season 9, Episode 19: "Stairmageddon".

Stairmageddon (2013)

"So when something as routine as elevator maintenance happens, and people are forced to expend cardiovascular effort, we have to compare it to the end of time." —Oscar Martinez

189. Season 9, Episode 20: "Paper Airplane".

Paper Airplane (2013)

"And if I went back now, when I'm broke and he just inherited a farm, I'd be one of those gold-digging tramps you read about that try to bag a farmer." —Angela Martin

190. Season 9, Episode 21: "Livin' the Dream".

Livin' the Dream (2013)

"Without my cats, I am utterly and completely alone." —Angela Martin

191. Season 9, Episode 22: "A.A.R.M.".

A.A.R.M. (2013)

"It's not the KGB, but it's a start." —Dwight Schrute

192. Season 9, Episode 23: "Finale".

Finale (2013)

"There's a lot of beauty in ordinary things." —Pam Halpert

"The Office" will most likely be remembered as one of the most popular shows of all time and it deserves to have its best one-liners immortalized.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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