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30 Dad Jokes That Are Sure To Make You Funnier Than Your Father

Dad jokes that will knock your socks off AND give you a boost of serotonin.

Olivia D White

Jul 19, 2021

Miami University

30 Dad Jokes That Are Sure To Make You Funnier Than Your Father

Photo by Hannah Nelson on Pexels

Here are some of my favorite dad jokes, just in case you needed a good laugh.

1. What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No eye-deer!

2. What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.

3. Why do dads take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?

In case they get a hole-in-one!

4. If April showers bring May flowers, what do you May flowers bring?

Pilgrims.

5. Guess who I saw today.

Everyone I looked at!

6. What do you call a fish wearing a bow tie?

So-fish-ticated.

7. I'm afraid for the calendar.

Its days are numbered.

8. Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth.

Then it's a soap opera.

9. What do you call a pudgy psychic?

A four-chin teller.

10. Want to know why nurses like red crayons?

Because sometimes they have to draw blood.

11. Why do bees have sticky hair?

Because they use a honeycomb!

12. What do you call an angry musician flipping someone off?

A songbird!

13. What's the most detail-oriented ocean?

The Pacific.

14. Why do seagulls fly over the ocean?

Because if they flew over the bay, we'd call them bagels!

15. I only know 25 letters of the alphabet.

I don't know y.

16. What's the best thing about Switzerland?

I don't know, but the flag is a big plus!

17. What does the sprinter eat before a race?

Nothing, they fast!

18. How do you get a squirrel to like you?

You act like a nut!

19. What do you call a body with no nose?

Nobody knows!

20 Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.

21. What did one hat say to another?

Stay here, I'm going on ahead.

22. Why can't a nose be 12 inches long?

Because then it would be a foot!

23. The graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in.

24. Why didn't the skeleton climb the mountain?

He didn't have the guts!

25. How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?

Ten tickles.

26. How do you make a tissue dance?

You Put a little boogie in it!

27. What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.

28. Do you want a box for your leftovers?

No, but I'll wrestle you for them!

29. Swimming with sharks is expensive.

It costs an arm and a leg!

30. Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke?

He won a 'no-bell' prize!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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30 Dad Jokes That Are Sure To Make You Funnier Than Your Father

Dad jokes that will knock your socks off AND give you a boost of serotonin.

1. What do you call a deer with no eyes?

2. What do you call a cow with no legs?

3. Why do dads take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?

4. If April showers bring May flowers, what do you May flowers bring?

5. Guess who I saw today.

6. What do you call a fish wearing a bow tie?

7. I'm afraid for the calendar.

8. Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth.

9. What do you call a pudgy psychic?

10. Want to know why nurses like red crayons?

11. Why do bees have sticky hair?

12. What do you call an angry musician flipping someone off?

13. What's the most detail-oriented ocean?

14. Why do seagulls fly over the ocean?

15. I only know 25 letters of the alphabet.

16. What's the best thing about Switzerland?

17. What does the sprinter eat before a race?

18. How do you get a squirrel to like you?

19. What do you call a body with no nose?

20 Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

21. What did one hat say to another?

22. Why can't a nose be 12 inches long?

23. The graveyard looks overcrowded.

24. Why didn't the skeleton climb the mountain?

25. How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?

26. How do you make a tissue dance?

27. What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

28. Do you want a box for your leftovers?

29. Swimming with sharks is expensive.

30. Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke?

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There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

13. To be well-rounded.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

16. To be prepared for anything.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

18. How to be creative.

19. To brush off gossip.

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

Email the professor

Attend the first class

Keep attending class

Have a backup plan

Remember that everything works out at the end

It's mandatory to have these conversations.

1. What do you do for a living?

2. What's your favorite color?

3. Do you have any siblings?

4. What's your favorite television show?

5. When is your birthday?

6. What's your biggest goal in life?

7. If you had three wishes granted to you by a genie, what would they be?

8. What's your favorite childhood memory?

9. If you could change one thing about your life, what would it be?

10. Are you a cat or a dog person?

11. Do you believe in a religion or any sort of spiritual power?

12. If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would it be?

13. What is your ideal date night?

14. Who was/is your celebrity crush?

15. What's a good way to cheer you up if you're having a bad day?

16. Do you have any tattoos?

17. Can you describe yourself in three words?

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