A big brother is someone most of us, but not all, are very lucky to have. Sure, not all relationships with brothers are God sent, but an older brother is a blessing in more ways than one. That crude, annoying, sometimes smelly, constantly obsessing over "muscles" and six packs, seemingly different species who you think was hatched from an egg, is actually the best gift God could have given you.
To my big brother (AKA Broski), and big brothers everywhere, there are a few things I want to thank you for.
1. Thank you for drawing on my face with permanent marker when I was a baby.
Have you ever noticed that no matter what, your big brother is always capable of making you laugh? When you're not screaming at him that is. Big brothers are actually your own personal comedian, even when they don't mean to be. Whether it's their jokes, or watching them completely wipe out during some outrageous stunt, they always manage to crack a smile on our faces. When I got my first bee sting, my mom chopped up some onion and put it on the little throbbing bump on my arm. I was not happy about having an onion taped unfashionably to my arm. That's where my big brother came in. Probably sick of hearing me cry, he taped two pieces of onion to his eyelids and ran around the house calling himself "onion boy." Before I knew it, I was taping onion to every exposed piece of skin that I could and my tears were gone.
2. Thank you for teaching me how to be a little weirdo.
Despite the fact that you probably regret this now, you helped turn me into the extremely hyper and "spastic" person you say I am today. From running around the house with underwear on our heads, to jumping back and forth between furniture pretending the ground was "lava," you taught me what it was to be a "high-energy" kid. Unfortunately for you, my crazy amount of energy never went away.
3. Thank you for teaching me how to be "tough."
Ah, the common phrase of big brothers everywhere, "Suck it up, you big baby!" Nothing sparked anger in me more than hearing that God forsaken phrase, and with that anger I'd gather up all of my might in my tiny little fists, and take a swing. Usually ending in you laughing at me, which made me even madder. Despite how much I didn't appreciate being your at-home sparring partner, you really did teach me how to take a punch. You taught me how to fight back (if I ever needed to) and gave me all the ins and outs of battling ninjas and thieves of the night. You also taught me the definition of "quick reflexes." However, that one was a process. At first, you started with "think fast!" but when I got good at that, you stopped giving out warnings. So thanks for making me extremely paranoid. However, without my "cat-like" reflexes, I'd probably have a few more scars than I do now.
4. Thank you for teaching me everything I know about sports.
Football and hockey: two words, two enchanting sports, two enthralling games. Games that would create an exciting silence in my household occasionally interrupted with bursts of loud yelling in excitement, cheering, frustration, and even defeat. Four quarters or three periods is all it took to set the mood of the entire household for days at a time. Your seriousness, along with dad's, about these sports taught me just how easy it was to become a dedicated fan. However, it wasn't just football and hockey that you would marvel over. You were a fan of all sports, an extremely talented soccer and baseball player, a gifted runner, and remarkable gymnast. Your strength and desire to play sports are what made me fall in love with them. I have never learned to love something so passionately as I did sports, and I have you to thank for that.
5. Thank you for terrorizing me with "monsters."
Ah, the horrifying "toilet monster." My arch nemesis. For years the toilet monster ruled the domain of bathrooms everywhere, sending me into a screaming sprint every time I flushed the toilet. And I probably would have kept running and screaming every time I flushed the toilet if you hadn't forced me to stay in there to witness the toilet monster with my own eyes (lucky for me the toilet monster wasn't real... phew). You're probably wondering why I'm thanking you for traumatizing me as a child, which is a really good question. The day you held the door knob, locking me in the bathroom, to potentially scare me to death was the day that I had overcome my biggest fear (at the time). Over the years, you have helped me realize that I can overcome virtually any fear if I put my mind to it, which has opened up so many doors and provided me with countless amazing opportunities.
My big brother is my best friend, and he always will be. Well, he kind of has to be whether he likes it or not, we share a bloodline. I am so grateful for everything you do for me, and I'm proud of the person who you helped shape me to be. To my big brother, and to big brothers everywhere, thank you. Your tricks, games, monsters, and free martial arts training sessions are, or will be, appreciated by all of us younger siblings. I have no idea where we'd be without you.
I love you broski!
- Your adorably "annoying" younger sibling
