We’re both from California. I went away to school 3,000 miles away; he’s working towards his degree at home.

We lead completely separate lives the majority of the time. We’re only able to spend less than six months together each year. I’m fairly sure my parents spend more time with him each year than I do (well isn’t that nice for them). There are days when our schedules clash and the most we can get across is a few hastily typed messages complaining about stress and exhaustion. The three hour time difference may not seem like a lot, but believe me, it can feel like an eternity. Its 10:30 a.m. and I have some exciting news to share, but he is still slumbering away with the sun just beginning to rise. He’s just getting out of class and I fell asleep an hour ago on those 80 pages for sociology. The worst part? It is incredibly easy to be oblivious to significant events in one another’s lives. Sometimes even the realization of missing an insignificant event can feel like the worst thing in the world. Long distance creates such a disconnect between couples and it truly does test the strength (and perhaps sanity) of both parties.

So why continue such a relationship? This is something I sometimes catch myself questioning. The short answer (and the cheesy one) is that I wouldn’t be who I am today without him. So while there are parts that are, for lack of a better word, excruciating, there is so much good that outweighs the bad. I know who I am, and he brings it out. I know I want valuable friends. Friends that aren't stuck in those boy-crazy ideals from high school. I want to surround myself with people who don't have the incessant need to go out and get wasted every Friday and Saturday night. Sometimes a night in, eating junk food and watching movies with good friends is just the right thing. I know that whatever may be happening here on campus, I’m not alone. I have the reassurance of someone who will always have my back, no matter the circumstance and no matter the distance (aside from my dear ol’ mom and dad). In the insanity that is college and all that it entails, it is such a relief to have the escape of someone who knows how to cheer you up and make you laugh without fail. Someone who is always there to listen to you complain and stress. Someone who motivates you to succeed both personally and academically.

I don’t mind being "tied down." I don’t mind taking those random just-because phone calls. I don’t mind putting somebody else’s interests over mine. I don’t mind proof-reading his news articles that show up in my inbox every week. I don’t mind seeing a text from 3 a.m. when I wake up in the morning. I definitely don’t mind ‘missing out’ on part of the college experience, because it's really not much of a loss. I don’t mind that people think I’m crazy for believing that long distance works. I don’t mind listening to my friends complain about how they’re never going to meet anybody (I’m only reminded of how lucky I am). I don’t mind because at the end of the day, I have somebody to say goodnight to.

All couples go through periods where they need to decide to break up or try long-distance. Long-distance is hard in all walks of life, but it’s especially so in a college setting. Being a college student brings all kinds of contradicting pressures, especially when it comes to romantic relationships. It can really make you doubt your own reality. After all this time, I say that my long-distance relationship is the best and worst thing that's happened to me because when it comes down to it, all the difficult parts are insignificant in light of our happiness and individual success.