Being the eldest child in a family of three, I have begun to learn the pros and cons. Not to say that there aren’t pros and cons to every spot in the birth order, but being the oldest I could be bold enough to say it’s the hardest sibling to be. I however, would never change being the oldest.
Con: Your Parents Are Stricter on You
If you’re the oldest child, I am sure you have complained about this a million times. Your parents have to take time to decide whether or not they will let you do anything. They are cautious about everything you do, and probably check in endless times when it’s your first time doing something. Then a couple years later when the same opportunity arises for your younger sibling, it’s no questions asked, see you later.
Con: Your Parents Are Still Learning Too
Your parents are usually your go to people, they just know everything. When it comes to first child things, sometimes they are a bit clueless. You are basically just the trial run for your parents. Being the first child in my family to go to college, my dad couldn’t be my go to because he often didn’t know too. Patience is key, because as much as us first borns are learning the ropes so are our parents.
Con: More Pressure
By default, the pressure is on you as the oldest. You are the example your siblings will follow. From a young age, your younger siblings will want to be just like you. There is a lot of pressure to make sure the person they try to emulate is a good one. Trying your hardest to be a good role model both socially, and academically can be a challenge but one we as the eldest eagerly take up.
Con: You’re an experiment.
Let’s face it, your parents don’t exactly know what’s going to work and what isn’t. Their parenting style, their discipline level and how “cool” they are going to be is all just a big experiment.
Pro: You Get to do Things First
Even though these things you get to do are strictly just because you are the age you are, it’s still exciting. You get to go to the movies alone first, learn how to drive first, and go away to college first. These little things are so exciting, even when your mom says to take your sister along.
Pro: You’re in Control.
You’re the big man on campus. Being the oldest gives you some authority, even if it’s not directly given to you by your parents. You were the meanest babysitter your siblings ever had. You yell at them for doing annoying things. You even yell at them for not doing their homework. No one will truly know where this authority comes from but it’s a good thing. You protect your younger siblings more than anything else.
Pro: You’re the secret favorite.
They will never admit this, but we all know that you are the favorite child. You were the first product of their love and marriage and that will always be special. You were the first baby they got to hold and the first baby they got to watch graduate high school and go to college. You are the favorite and always will be, just don’t tell the others.
