Depression is an exhausting and debilitating mental illness that can destroy a person. Every day is a mountain you have to climb and it's so exhausting that you just want to curl up and never leave your home. You feel like everyone hates you and that your all alone with no one to make it better. Sometimes its so bad that nothing anyone says can make the thoughts go away and all you can do is to try to find an outlet for the pain. Living with depression can be one of the hardest things that a person may ever have to go through, but being in a relationship with someone who has depression can be just as hard.
If you are in a relationship with someone who has depression then you know just how emotional and unstable things can be. One day your partner is happy and joyful and the next they are sad and crying. You see them go through their various phases of depression wishing that you could do something to make their pain go away, yet you can't. Nothing you say helps and they constantly deny that you love them not because they think you don't, but because they can't imagine why anyone would love them. If they say or show that they are upset you try anything to cheer them up or to distract them scared that they will go into a panic attack if you don't. Sometimes it can be even worse.
If they have a panic attack, it can be one of the most frightful moments you will ever have to go through. Your worried sick that they will try to harm themselves in one way or another and you try to find any type of outlet for them to bring them back to reality. There have been countless nights where I have done various things to bring my girlfriend back from a panic attack ranging from playing music for her to just being next to her to let her know she's not alone. Everything you do in these moments matter and helping them know that they have someone there that cares about them is one of the most important things you can do.
This is barely touching the tip of the iceberg when it comes to being in a relationship with someone who has depression. It's important, though, that if you do live with someone who has depression that you show them that you love them and care about them. Know that they may say mean and hateful things in their bad moments but if they do it's not them, it's the depression talking. Reassure them that they are not a burden and that you will be there with them even when they don't want to be around themselves. The more love and care you give them the better they will be and the more likely they will seek help if they haven't already.
Being in a relationship with someone who has depression also has its rewards. It really shows you to appreciate life, especially the small moments. Watching your partner smile with joy and to see them be happy is one of the most rewarding things you will ever feel. It also shows you how to love in ways you never thought was possible. You learn different ways to love and to show your love for your partner. They will show love to you as well and it will be one of the best things in your relationship with them. Because you have stuck by them and helped them through their hardest moments they too will show you love you didn't think existed. No matter how bad they may get, they will still love you and will fight for you. Remember that depression is a very serious illness that can take lives so never give up on someone who has depression because you may be the only thing keeping them going.
