From the beginning you're assigned the term "male" or "female" based on your genitalia. Most of the world (or at least the US) thinks that your genitals should define how you dress, act, talk, etc. For the "girl" and "woman" label there are ridiculous standards and stereotypes that one must live up to to be seen as a part of "normal" society. I am going to list some of the things that irk me most about being a cisgendered female.
1. Having Old Men Call Me Names
I work for tips in a restaurant, so sometimes it's really hard to suck this one up and move on. I can't tell you how many times old (and young) men think it's okay to call me "honey" or "darling." It's not cute. It's not getting you better service. It's pissing me off. I'm not your honey, darling, sweetheart, baby, or any other word you would call your daughter. Do you see these men calling other men those names? No. Because other men are not their objects.
2. The Clothes, Makeup, & Accessories
Newsflash clothing designers: Not every woman is made to fit into your ill fitted clothes. I just went into Forever 21 the other day and found a really cute top sitting on a table. I picked it up and it was a crop top. WHYYYYY. It seems like the clothes of today have less and less fabric and more and more logos and stupid acronyms. Not every girl wants to have her body exposed that much. Am I ashamed of my body? Not at all, but being more covered up is how I am more comfortable and it's so hard to find clothes like that now. My go-to is the men's section in most stores because those clothes actually fit and give me room to breathe.
Girls are also expected to wear makeup all the time 24/7, and if you don't people will say things like, "are you sick?"
And in general, why do clothes even have gendered divides? What makes men's clothes mens and vice versa? CLOTHES HAVE NO GENDER. We have been conditioned into these divisions.
3. The Virginity Clause
What even is virginity??? It's a socially constructed word. Girls are expected to be innocent until provoked. But if a girl wants to dress more "provocative" she's considered a "slut". This isn't the same for boys.
4. Being an Object
The fact that when I google, "pet peeves of being a girl" and this comes up saddens me. This just shows 1.) how much of a heteronormative society we live in, and 2.) WE AREN'T HERE TO PLEASE MEN.
5. Men Opening Doors for Me
I know not a lot of people will agree with me on this, but it has to be said. I know it's what a decent human is supposed to do, but would these men open the door for other men? Probably not. I can open my own door and I (and you) can also open the door for anyone of any gender.
These are only a few of the daily tropes I deal with. My dream is that one day we all think of each other as just humans with no labels, but until then I'm going to keep fighting.
**this article only takes into perspective my own cisgendered white hetero female experience. I cannot speak for women and men of color, trans women & men, lesbian/gay women & men, and/or other non-binary female & male identified humans!**
