Who hasn’t heard the expression, “They wear their heart on their sleeve"?
The phrase is often accompanied by a sigh or used to explain why a person responds in a drastic manner. I find it’s often associated with “over-emotional” people because they are the ones who tend to show their feelings most transparently. Very emotional people are judged by the tears they so easily shed, and the words they take too personally. Girls are labeled as a “hot mess,” and boys, “soft.”
If we’re really being honest though -- at this point in early adulthood -- it’s typically females who are associated with being “over-emotional.” Boys dodge commitment, recruitment evokes insecurity, the future (and our place in it) is everything but certain. It’s the perfect concoction for a good and hearty cry. Please notice I said “our,” because this observation stems from personal experience, not generalizations. Shocker: I am a very, very emotional person. My entire life, I’ve over-analyzed and taken to heart each criticism, passive aggressive comment, and eye roll that has come my way. I take it to heart and let it linger there. And I am not good at hiding it. This, I will admit, has undoubtedly hindered me.
When something frustrates me, I feel anger. When I feel unsure, I feel anxious. Do you see the pattern? For people who “wear their hearts on their sleeves,” our emotions are slightly amplified (and easy to observe). Sadness/heartbreak is an especially tough one. When a boy hurts our feelings, we internalize it until it physically produces pain within our hearts. A relationship that may take someone a month to get over can take a more emotional person three times as long. So what could possibly be beautiful about being too emotional? This is something that has taken me (too much) time to realize, but wearing one’s heart on their sleeve can be a glorious thing. Remember the pattern I mentioned earlier? It can be applied positively, too. For overly emotional people, happiness turns to elation, interest turns to passion, and “like” blossoms into love. These strong emotions can be channeled so productively into sports, careers, healthy relationships… you name it!
I wouldn’t be the dancer I am today if I didn’t feel a passion for it. My emotions have driven me to move earnestly, and create wholeheartedly. I can empathize with those who surround me because it’s likely I’ve felt how they are feeling. As an extra-emotional person, I know that someday I will love my kids more than the air I breathe. When I find the right companion, I’m confident that I am capable of love, especially after having given affection to people who didn’t return it. My feelings will make me a happier, more successful woman if I continue to channel my emotions towards the right places (easier said than done, I know).
So, what does this all mean and how does it relate to people other than myself? If you find that your blood boils quicker than other people’s -- it is OK. If you notice yourself stressing the small things in life when they don’t matter to the larger picture -- accept that stress is part of what makes you a beautiful, quirky human. And if you feel absolutely heartsick over a boy who didn’t deserve you in the first place -- realize it shows that you have a lot of love to give to the world (and eventually to a very lucky person). Before I made this realization, I saw a quote that said, “I wear my heart on my sleeve, and I don’t plan on putting it anywhere else.” I scoffed because I wished I could be seen as a tough, stoic individual. Now, I would not trade my sensitivity for the world, because it makes me the Emma that I am. I’m a better friend, daughter, and student for it. Never trade in your sensitivity, either. Never apologize for your feelings, and never turn off Adele when you know you just need a good cry.
Confidently wear your heart on your sleeve, and feel a lot of feelings (because they are a blessing, I swear).
