Recently I have been super conflicted about what I want to major in.
When I transferred to App State, I thought I was 100% sure that I wanted to be a high school English teacher. I signed up for teaching classes, started excessively pinning things on Pinterest for my future classroom, and then my optimism vanished.
After taking two of the three teaching classes I was in, I started to think that teaching wasn't for me. I got scared and intimidated that I would be the worst teacher in the world and I would forget everything I was taught about how to have an effective classroom.
So after one semester, I was done... Or so I thought.
I went back and forth the whole Christmas break between teaching and the other major I wanted to change to. It was stressful and unnecessary (I ended up sticking with teaching - the major I originally started out with).
I know that I'm not the only one that goes through this stressful experience in college. It's not uncommon for college students to change their major every now and then. If you're one of the lucky people that go into college knowing what you want to do and never thinking about switching, here's what you missed on (be thankful):
1. Emotional Breakdowns.
This was almost a nightly thing for me. I'm someone who doesn't like to cry in front of people - for pride reasons - so I did this at night when I was alone. People who are so conflicted on what they want to do with their lives have so much stress on them that it's almost impossible to not feel so emotionally overwhelmed. Everyone in college has a lot of stress on them because of their classes, but when you're unsure of what classes you even need to take, it weighs on you.
2. The "I Don't Know" Stage.
Even though I feel like this is the stage I'm always in, it's impossible to literally not know anything when people ask you the annoying question, "What do you want to do?" My parents got so aggravated with me when they tried to talk to me about my major and they asked this question because I came back with, "I don't know." Because literally I. Didn't. Know. You're so unsure of yourself and your future career so when people ask a question - major related or not - you just say "I don't know" because after all, do you even really know anything?
3. Stressed To The Max.
It's already stressful enough to be a college student, but to not know what you want to do with the rest of your life AND not knowing when you have little time to figure out... that's another story. I'm 19 years old, the world is my oyster apparently, so why do I have to be so sure what I want to do for the next 40 years instantly? Why do I have so little time to figure it out? It's insanely stressful to be so unsure when you only have about 4 years to get ready until your ass is out in the real world. Thank God someone created chocolate and wine to help me get by.
4. What's The Meaning Of Life?
The question that constantly runs through your head. I started to ask this everyday which led me to thinking, "What's the purpose of life?" I started to get so overwhelmed that I started to think that maybe I would just work at McDonald's for the rest of my life or no where at all... that seemed to be where I was headed. When you're so overwhelmed with your life, crazy thoughts start to pop in your head and make you question everything you know. Who needs a major? Who needs college? Why is life the way that it is? The questions are endless.
5. When You Finally Figure It Out, It's A Breath Of Fresh Air.
Finally, the clarity you've been searching for. Even though it can be cases like mine where it's been your first choice all along, nothing beats the free feeling of the weight being lifted and the stress being gone.
So to all of my fellow college students - especially those indecisive - keep pushing through. We all know how stressful college is. And to those who are going through this stressful, overwhelming time, don't worry, your time is coming and you'll figure out what you're meant to do. You are not alone!
Feminism Redefined
