Let's be real: 20-somethings are all really good at faking it. Do any of us actually have it together? I feel like I speak for the majority of us when I say I have no clue how to be an adult. In fact, even though I'm adult in almost every sense of the word, I still feel like I'm 13-years-old. I honestly don't even know how this happened? One day I woke up and life was like "Boom. Responsibilities." The struggle of being a small child trapped in a psuedo-adult's body is real. In all honesty, I should be stripped of my title as an adult for the following reasons.
1. I am incapable of feeding myself.
I honestly don't know how I haven't died yet. Even though I'm actually a pretty good cook, I never prepare legitimate meals for myself. Last weekend I had buttered toast for two meals. Adults eat balanced meals. I do not.
2. I choose sleep over responsibilities way too often.
I don't know how people do that thing where they get four hours of sleep and then are productive members of society the next day. If I don't get at least six hours I'm useless, and I'm not really firing on all cylinders without eight hours. I hit the snooze button every single day. Do you think adults shirk responsibilities to catch a few extra z's? No. They're busy playing the stock market.
3. I really shouldn't be left in control of my own finances.
I am honestly so bad when it comes to saving money. Although I have perfected this skill a little bit more since starting college, I still spend obscene amounts of money on food. And I don't mean groceries. Adults go grocery shopping. I buy Doritos Locos Tacos and complain that I have no money after eating out every other day (See No. 1).
4. I rely way too much on my mom.
The amount of times I have to contact my mom to get help being a functioning adult is pitiful. How do I do my taxes? How do I check my credit score? How necessary is an oil change really? Moms know these things. Moms have mastered adulting.
5. I have logged more hours on Netflix than I have on the treadmill.
Look, it's not that I don't understand the importance of a healthy lifestyle. I'm all on board with being the best version of yourself. The sad fact, though, is that when it comes to actually enacting these changes, I fail miserably. I will hit "play next episode" instead of going for a run. In fact, if you hear me saying I'm going for a run, it's most likely a cry for help. Investigate further.
6. My whole life is one big ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
On a pretty regular basis, people ask me things assuming that I know what I'm talking about. Don't make me talk about grad school. I don't know when I'm going to get settled down. I don't even know what I'm going to eat for breakfast tomorrow. Teach me your grown-ups ways. Also, please make my doctors appointment for me. I'm not a classic 90's movie, but I sure am clueless.
The fact that people look at me and no longer place me in the "child" category is terrifying. I must do a pretty good job of hiding my utter incompetence because people say I'm so responsible. Fake it 'til you make it is essentially my life motto. I'm still waiting to get my adulthood revoked but in the meantime, I'll be pretending I'm a productive and organized human being.
