Being A Modern Woman In 2019

Being A Modern Woman In 2019

Here are 5 things that are different about being a woman in 2019.


The era of women is nigh. With the era of #MeToo, it may really feel like we have entered into the time when women truly do run the world and while there have been countless changes over the years that have forged us in the right direction there is still a ways to go and here's why!

1. Women are still vulnerable in many ways

The R Kelly, Harvey Winestein and Bill Cosby scandal (and countless others) should tell you that in many ways that young girls and young women are taken advantage of. These are famous men. And there are countless women out there who don't report the abuse, who suffer in silence for years and who never receive justice. But at least now with the #MeToo era, we appear to be moving in the right direction.

2. Women are still the least paid

While in many ways society had come a long way in gender equality, like race relations we have a long way to go. Women get paid about 75 cents to every dollar men get paid according to labor statistics.

3. The demands of motherhood haven't changed

But what has is the perception of what it takes to be a Mom in today's era. A recent study finally proves that being a Mom is equivalent to a 2.5 FTE. Let's think about that for a second...TWO POINT FTE.

4. The demands of life haven't changed for working Moms

Now add a paid job on top of that 2.5 FTE. And as we know the climate is changing. Gone are the days of loyalty from a company. The big conglomerates mega business means that being an employee today, you are doing 2.5 times the work of the past.

5. The demands of gender assigned roles haven't changed

Now let's add wives demands inherent to the gender roles within a marriage to that mix: i.e. dinner on the table by 6 and in bed ready for action by 9 p.m.

This means that modern day women have the equivalent of about 7FTE . Truthfully, there aren't enough hours in the day for that. The demands of modern-day women aren't realistic. Now if you are lucky like me and you find a man who will go to work, come home and cook you dinner. Who on some weeks recognizing that your job, where you are expected to work 2.5 times longer harder and faster than a person in the role 20, 30, 50 years ago, will take the kids out to give you some time to soak in a relaxing bath. Who will celebrate you for all your accomplishments and support you by taking the fair share of the load when it comes to your children...then really you've hit the jackpot short of winning the lottery.

Now if you have a child who needs more of your attention, developmentally delayed or special needs, that 2.5 FTE goes to 5FTE. You have to take that child to several therapists several times a week. If you are lucky and your job is understanding that can work but if you are unlucky, every time you leave to take care of what needs to be done, for your child you have to rise earlier and finish later to get it all accomplished. No wonder the modern woman is exhausted.

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To The Dad Who Didn't Want Me, It's Mutual Now

Thank you for leaving me because I am happy.

Thank you, for leaving me.

Thank you, for leaving me when I was little.

Thank you, for not putting me through the pain of watching you leave.

Thank you, for leaving me with the best mother a daughter could ask for.

I no longer resent you. I no longer feel anger towards you. I wondered for so long who I was. I thought that because I didn't know half of my blood that I was somehow missing something. I thought that who you were defined me. I was wrong. I am my own person. I am strong and capable and you have nothing to do with that. So thank you for leaving me.

In my most vulnerable of times, I struggled with the fact that you didn't want me. You could have watched me grow into the person that I have become, but you didn't. You had a choice to be in my life. I thought that the fact that my own father didn't want me spoke to my own worth. I was wrong. I am so worthy. I am deserving, and you have nothing to do with that. So thank you for leaving me.

You have missed so much. From my first dance to my first day of college, and you'll continue to miss everything. You won't see me graduate, you won't walk me down the aisle, and you won't get to see me follow my dreams. You'll never get that back, but I don't care anymore. What I have been through, and the struggles that I have faced have brought me to where I am today, and I can't complain. I go to a beautiful school, I have the best of friends, I have an amazing family, and that's all I really need.

Whoever you are, I hope you read this. I hope you understand that you have missed out on one of the best opportunities in your life. I could've been your daughter. I could have been your little girl. Now I am neither, nor will I ever be.

So thank you for leaving me because I am happy. I understand my self-worth, and I understand that you don't define me. You have made me stronger. You have helped make me who I am without even knowing it.

So, thank you for leaving me.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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10 Father's Day Quotes To Share With Your Dad

"Any man can be a father, but it takes someone special to be a dad."
— Anne Geddes

Fathers are peculiar figures in our lives. They lack the frantic affection of mothers, yet display a certain tenderness of their own toward their children. They've done some crazy stunts of their own, yet fuss over their kids' tiniest mishaps. They're there for the ride of child-rearing no shorter than mothers, and yet their emotional experience isn't exactly the same.

Fathers are our parents, teachers, and providers. It only seems right to take a day out of each year to honor all that they do for us. And so in the spirit of the holiday, I've listed ten Father's Day quotes below for you to share with your own dads.

“The power of a dad in a child’s life is unmatched.” —Justin Ricklefs


It's true: a father's emotional presence in his relationship with his children can make all the difference in how the child turns out as an adult, for better or worse. A dad receives his parenting "report card," so to say, once the child reaches adulthood and either chooses to continue visiting home or stay away.

However, for a large portion of a child's youth, a dad has most of the power over his relationship with his children. The development of the relationship is entirely dependent on how he chooses to treat his children.

“It is a wise father that knows his own child.” —William Shakespeare


You can't deny this one, either. Most good fathers know their children better than they know themselves. My own dad frequently knows what I'm feeling before I do. The best fathers are tuned in to their children's emotions, and they certainly try their best to help you when problems arise.

“A father’s smile has been known to light up a child’s entire day.” —Susan Gale


Remember way back when the most exciting part of your day was when your dad came home from work? It's a magical feeling to reflect on those days and recall that the simplest things our fathers do can bring smiles to our faces. It's healthy to retain a bit of that childlike wonder as an adult, and we can't ever forget that.

“Fathers just have a way of putting everything together.” —Erika Cosby


Although it may be somewhat begrudgingly, you'll admit that you're almost never disappointed when you seek advice from your dad. Your dad is truly great at piecing together puzzles that you can't solve yourself, and you're grateful for his invaluable input. You wouldn't be where you are now if it weren't for his words.

“A father carries pictures where his money used to be.” —Steve Martin

Personal Image

For the father who has what it takes to be a dad, children teach him that there's much more to life than money. Matters of the heart exceed the value of money, and wallet photographs most likely serve as a reminder of the children for whom he must provide.

After having kids, a man no longer works for his own livelihood, but for that of his own family. And for this, your father certainly deserves much more recognition than he may receive at times.

“Dad: A son’s first hero, a daughter’s first love.” —Unknown


From the moment a child sees his or her father for the first time, a heavy responsibility is placed upon his shoulders. A dad must be a role model for how his son is to behave and a standard to which a daughter sets herself to seek out a partner. Hence, a father is a son's first idol and a daughter's first love, as the saying goes.

“A father doesn’t tell you that he loves you. He shows you.” —Dimitri the Stoneheart


Oftentimes, a father uses his actions rather than his to show you that he loves you. He works to put food on the table because he loves you. He teaches you how to drive because he wants you to stay safe. He shows you how to change a tire so that you aren't stranded anywhere. Everything he does, he does with love.

“My father didn’t do anything unusual. He only did what dads are supposed to do—be there.” —Max Lucado


And what more can you ask of a good dad?

"I'll never forget how I felt at that moment. I felt that my father was a great man." —Kevin Arnold


Every child has a moment when he or she realizes that the sacrifices that a father makes are all for their children's benefit. Every child has a moment at which he or she understands that a father is only human, makes mistakes and has more aspirations than meets the eye. It's eye-opening to comprehend that our father is a normal people like you but somehow makes him all the more of an inspiration.

“A dad is someone who wants to catch you when you fall. Instead he picks you up, brushes you off and lets you try again.” —Unknown


If there's one thing your fathers teaches you, it's perseverance. And you couldn't love him more so for it.

Father's Day is one of our greatest holidays, so this father's day, remember to thank him for all he's done for you.

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