Lately, I’ve found myself thinking, “I wish someone loved me as much as I love myself.” That sounds selfish, but it’s not. I love myself, and I’m not afraid to admit it. Loving yourself is a basic principle for any successful relationship. Admiring your strengths, working on your weaknesses, and standing tall and being confident in what you have to give to the table.

Sure, I have days when I think I’m ugly, or sometimes I have breakdowns when my clothes don’t fit, but what’s on the outside doesn’t matter, because I love the true core of myself.

I love that I have to go to bed early because I don’t like sleeping in. I love that I am very particular about every product I buy. I love all of my quirks, and I want someone to love them, too. I want someone to watch old-time movies and terrible documentaries with me. I want someone who understands how important studying is to me. I want someone to remember my entire order at a restaurant and surprise me with it. I want someone who wants to know these parts of me. I would love to love someone who loves these things, but I’m happy loving myself.

This person might come one day, but if not, it’s totally OK. Why? Because I love myself enough for me and someone else. I’m a full believer in RuPaul’s quote, “If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell can you love somebody else?” In order to achieve high emotional intelligence, you must start with the basics: self-awareness. Knowing yourself is the key to loving yourself. Know what you do and who you are, and if you -- not anyone else -- don’t like what you have going, change it. Exchange it for something you do love. Create this person you smile at in the mirror and zone off thinking about.

I have come a long way from the insecure person I was in high school, and even at the start of college. I have avoided relationships because I never saw myself as good enough and took pride in my values. I’m a work in progress, and I’m ready to share that with someone who wants to watch me grow.

So many girls and women think that they’ve found love, but don’t know what it is. The reason is because they don’t take the time to get to know themselves, and then they settle. They don’t know what they deserve. I know that I deserve someone who wants to get to know me, and I won’t stop until I find it.

My advice to everyone: don’t look for love until you’ve found it in yourself. Don’t ask for love when you can’t love yourself because you won’t understand what kind of love you deserve.