Moving On And Letting Go

Moving On And Letting Go

Why I'm actually okay with being single.


After a three year relationship, I knew the memories would never fade overnight, but I also didn't expect to find moving on such a beautiful process. Granted, it has not been an overabundance of happiness and positivity, but in my newfound single life, I have learned more about myself than I ever did in a relationship.

If I could go back in time, I do not regret how and why things ended. The how and why to our ending is quite ambiguous as I still have yet to formulate a legitimate response to when people ask why we broke up. College is a true test to one's individuality and their dedication to others, and we simply failed that test. It became toxic and unhealthy -- two characteristics a relationship will never thrive on.

The best decision was to go our separate ways. Now we have past mistakes to learn from and an entire world left ahead of us to see.

Though the heartbreak felt insufferable, all things do happen for a reason and I stand strongly in this belief. In the pain and suffering, I came to find myself in a way I never have before. This freedom provided both of us an opportunity we would have never had in the past: growth and strength. At least it did for me.

In a new place with new people, we were forced to find ourselves on our own. It was a tremendous change from the dependency we provided each other back in high school.

I wouldn't change the outcome of our situation because I am becoming a better person as a result.

This is certainly not to say that I don't miss being in a relationship. Of course, I miss aspects, but it certainly isn't everything. I became accustomed to the companionship, the phone calls checking in, the endless naps and cuddles. I told myself it was okay to miss him, any rational person would.

But that phase soon comes to an end as the void that was once filled with the relationship, must be filled elsewhere. I have made beautiful friendships that bring so much positivity to my life. I believe some of my relationships with my friends have grown so strong in our adjustment to college as they saw my pain and I saw theirs and we became each other's support system.

I also learned to become my own support system. I spent years thinking that I would always have at least one person to catch me when I fell, but when that person disappeared I only had myself. In the quiet moments, where all the thinking is done, I came to realize what I personally needed to develop a healthy mindset.

It's important to love yourself and be proud of yourself in order to spread that love to others. I never truly loved myself to my fullest potential and though it's a slow and steady process, I'm getting there.

College is the place to thrive and I've been doing just that. I am sure as hell not ashamed either.

Ultimately, I took this time to cultivate interests I never knew I had. I came to college to become the best possible version of myself and that's exactly what I am going to do.

Writing and reading have become my outlet into a creative world I never knew I would belong to. I plan to pursue this passion to its fullest extent. This campus offers so many opportunities and resources to become the person you're supposed to and I would be a fool to not take advantage of them.

This is no longer a time to mourn a dead relationship. The worst thing I can do to myself is holding onto a past that will negatively impact my future.

It's ironic how one must go through loss and pain before positivity and growth can be seen. I have always tried to avoid that suffering at all costs, but in some way, I'm thankful for it. It's not a pain welcomed on a periodic basis, but it is allowing me to reach the potential I always dreamed to reach.

Even though many girls at this time are scrambling to find a significant other as cuffing season rapidly approaches us, I'm okay with being single. This season it's all about me.

Popular Right Now

40 Small Things That Make College Students Happy

It doesn't take much...

1. When class is canceled.

2. When the coffee shop you stop at five minutes before your 8 a.m. has a short line.

3. Coffee, coffee, coffee.

4. Open note tests.

5. Or even better, take home tests.

6. The unofficial assigned seating process that that takes place after the first week or so of classes.

7. Thursday nights. (because in college, Thursday qualifies as the weekend.)

8. Sales.

9. Or once again, even better, free things.

10. Specifically free food.

11. Dogs.

12. Dogs on campus.

13. Tailgates and Saturday afternoon football games.

14. Finding an already completed Quizlet for your exam.

15. Having an extra 30 minutes for a nap, and if you're lucky, an hour.

16. Netflix.

17. When your roommate takes out the trash.

18. Weekends after test weeks.

19. The rare blessing of a curve on an exam.

20. Getting out of class early.

21. How in college, it is socially expectable to wear a t-shirt everyday.

22. Being able to walk from class to class or eat in the dining hall without having to see anyone you know. (and thank goodness too because you probably don't look too good.)

23. Crossing things off of your to-do list.

24. Your best-friends that you make in college.

25. A full tank of gas.

26. Seeing a new face everyday.

27. Crawling back into bed after your 8 or 9 a.m. (or after any class that ends with a.m.)

28. Care packages.

29. No cover charges.

30. When adults tell you that it is okay that you have no idea what you want to do with your life yet. (regardless of what parents or your advisor may say.)

31. Pizza.

32. Finding out you weren't the only one who did poorly on the exam.

33. Deciding not to buy the textbook, and never needing it.

34. Finding the perfect gif to express how you're feeling. (Michael Scott just get it.)

35. Weekends at home because...

36. Pets.

37. Mom's home cooked pie and Dad's steak dinners,

38. Spring Break.

39. Road trips.

40. When it finally starts to cool down outside so you can show up to class dry instead of dripping in sweat.

Cover Image Credit: Abigail Wideman

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

Everyone Should Experience Working In Fast Food Or Retail

Working in fast food was definitely not sunshine, lollipops, and rainbows, but I'm so glad I did it.


I know these jobs aren't glamorous. In fact, most days I looked forward to clocking out before I had even clocked in. I always secretly rolled my eyes when an angry customer droned on and on about how entitled he or she was. Though I can name a lot of bad things that happened on the job, it wasn't all horrible. As I reflect on my time working in fast food, I realize how much having that job really taught me and how grateful I am to have had that experience. I really think everyone should work in fast food or retail at some point, and here's why:

You make some great friends from work. I get it, sometimes your co-workers are royal jerks or flat out creeps. You see your name on the schedule next to theirs and immediately try switching with someone else. I've been there. However, I have worked with some amazing people as well.

Every time I worked with one girl in particular, we laughed for entire shifts. One night, we were singing the national anthem at the top of our lungs without realizing a customer had come in (to our surprise, she applauded our terrible screaming). Another coworker and I turned up the radio on full blast when business was slow and had dance battles. We made the most of our shifts, and I still talk to some of these people today.

You learn how to deal with difficult people. It's the age-old story: the uppity customer thinks twelve dollars for a meal combo is outrageous and Where is your manager?!

My friend and I were once called stupid and a customer said he would never come back to our restaurant to eat ever again. At the moment, we were scared out of our minds because we were both pretty new to the job. As time passed, we became more patient and tolerant and knew what triggered these particular customers. Dealing with these adversities definitely helps in the long run, particularly when it comes to doing group work with people who seem unbearable.

Your people skills increase by a landslide. I had always thought that I was great with people before I had a job. However, when I found myself in situations where I had to talk to strangers, I would grow nervous and stumble across my words from time to time. Working in an environment where communicating with others is a driving force helped me not only with improving my public speaking, but also made me more outgoing. In situations where I once backed into the corner to avoid having to talk to someone, I now take charge and initiate a conversation.

You establish a connection with regular customers. My favorite customer was named Jack. He was the sweetest old man who came in every Wednesday and Friday and bought food for himself and his wife. I quickly memorized his order, which impressed him. We shared pleasantries every time he came in, and my coworkers and I looked forward to seeing him.

Establishing a relationship with people who come in a lot helps immensely when it comes to working. It also provides a sense of accomplishment when you memorize an order. Not to mention, the customers start to like you and typically leave a generous tip!

You have stories to tell for a lifetime! Sometimes bad things happen at work. Once I was holding a hot pan and burned my arm— I still have the burn mark on my arm to prove it. My point is, it sucked at the moment, but now I look back and laugh.

One time I asked my coworker how to make soup and she replied, "Slowly, but beautifully." It was so nonchalant that I cracked up for hours. There was also a time when a customer asked me for outlandish toppings and condiments that we didn't offer. The craziest story, though, was the drug deal that went down in our public restrooms. My coworker and I obviously could not leave our station and follow these people into the bathroom, so we were pretty much defenseless. Nobody got hurt or anything, so it made for a great story.

Working in fast food was definitely not sunshine, lollipops, and rainbows, but I'm so glad I did it. It made me more independent and outgoing and gave me memories I'll never forget.

Related Content

Facebook Comments