With the way society portrays you to be, sometimes it can be hard to be yourself. You want others to accept you, but you're afraid they won't like you for you. You pretend to be the person they see you as and it doesn't feel right, but you do it anyways. You're afraid to be yourself because you're not only trying to find yourself, but you're afraid of others not liking you, which then plays a factor of who you should be and who you think you are. I didn't understand this until recently. I used to be outgoing and obedient because I wanted to be liked by everyone. I talked to everyone, got along with everyone, and laughed and smiled wherever I went. I was afraid of not being accepted and not having any friends, which led me to a point in my life where I felt like I didn't really have friends. I felt lonely because I was trying to be someone I wasn't.
What took me by surprise, though, was how many people I had in my life that supported me and loved me for me when I was trying to be someone else and when I was being myself. I'm still trying to be more myself and show others who I am, which can be disheartening because you don't know how they'll react. There is a quote that I love that helps me to stay positive, though. "Don't change so people will like you, be yourself and the right people will love you. There's nothing real about being fake, and there's nothing fake about being real." (Trent Shelton).
Better late than never, but I'm going to tell you to be yourself! It's hard to differentiate who you are and who you think you are because you're so used to being someone some person wants you to be. You've probably heard the phrase "be yourself" hundreds of times, and yet you still don't follow through. The step to finding yourself and being yourself is hard because it may mean change; but I promise you, you will be happier with the people that surround you then, and you will start to be more loving towards yourself.
Change makes you uneasy and is uncomfortable. You've lived your life at a steady pace, trying to be what others and society want you to be, but that isn't you. You are so unique that no one can be you, but you. Why do you want to be someone you're not? The answer is simple. You want to feel accepted and "normal". You're afraid of being judged and afraid of not fitting in. You want people to accept you so you become the person they want you to be instead of the person you are. It's hard to take a step back and re-evaluate yourself because it means you're going to take that huge step forward to rediscovering and accepting yourself. After you take that step, though, it becomes easier than pretending to be someone you're not. Yeah, it's going to suck because you're going to face those who don't like you, but it's going to be awesome because you're going to have people who love you! You will be a happier and more joyful you. Ralph Waldo Emerson says it best, “To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
Be proud of who you are even if it means you may lose a few here and there. I understand that you might just not mesh with them anymore and things fall apart. That can be really scary and emotional because you're not letting go of them, but being let go of. The funny concept about that, though, is that if they truly loved you and/or were your friend, they would accept you for you because they still want you in their life. You are still accepted as you because you are you! Easier said than done and easier to understand than live through it, but they say the hardest things in life are the most important things in life... and being yourself is one of them.
You are so important and so valuable. Don't regret being you, because you are special and one-of-a-kind. Be you, be unique, love yourself, accept yourself, and the rest will follow.
