Some people are socially gifted. For them, connecting to other humans is as easy as breathing. I am not one of those people, and most of my friends aren't either. Even if you were given more than your fair share of awkward, other awkward people need friends too!
Einstein says everything is relative; that includes social capability. By myself, I can be quite shy, but in my crowd I am a social butterfly. Awkwardness is also relative and can even be situation specific. The world's best water skier may feel fine in their element, but freeze up at the thought of dancing in front of others. Don't feel like being shy or awkward creates limits. It just means making friends is going to be a little different.
For the awkward person, making friends requires forethought and effort. I require only a few close friends. Others require a lengthy and diverse list of people. It isn't a quota. Social media constantly encourages us to get more 'friends' and more 'followers'. But, no one is keeping count in real life.
Social pressure is definitely real on and offline. Partying is not my idea of a good time, yet I can easily feel left out when a group of friends spends their Friday night in a club. Social anxiety is also real. I don't like crowds, and I'm guessing I share that with other awkward people. If you want to stay in and watch Netflix, then by all means watch Netflix. No shame! If the thought of making friends is a little scary, know you can set the pace. Stepping out of a comfort zone can be hard, so do it in reasonable increments.
A possible strategy is to treat everyone like they are your friend anyway. For instance, there's always this awkward confrontation when walking past someone who shares a class with you. You know their name, but do they know yours? Should you smile? Maybe waving is a better idea, or a nod? Forget the conundrum and just say hi. If they don't know you at that moment, they will recognize you in class as the person who noticed them. You come out looking like a friendly, thoughtful person, and they are probably a little pleased about being recognized.
Similar to treating everyone like your friend, you can pretend that everyone in the room automatically loves you. There's nothing you can do to change that, so feel free to be your true self. Warning: overconfidence can be misconstrued as cockiness, and should be avoided at all times.
Furthermore, if you feel awkward when dancing, like the aforementioned water skier, just dance. Dancing makes you feel good. As a form of exercise, it releases endorphins. Unlike exercise, it is a fun time. Don't worry about being a good dancer. Odds are they do not make up the majority of any dance floor. I always feared someone was going to come around and point out how basic my dancing was. I wasn't even sure if I was going to dance more than a song at my senior prom. Don't do that. Dance, always dance. No one is going to criticize you for trying, and it's a blast.
Conversation is also key when making friends. Start with the basics. Where are you from? What have you got going today? Some people literally carry around conversation starters. It may be a button on their purse, a cool hat, or anything that references a show/book.
I met one of my best friends in college when she plopped her exploding TARDIS backpack between our chairs in class. "Who's your favorite Doctor?" led to a great conversation and a wonderful relationship.
Making friends can be difficult for those without natural "cool" talent. It isn't impossible, it just requires effort. Start slow. It's a skill, and skills get better with practice.
