"Well Lydia, tell your readers that the first thing they should remember is that the world is an unspeakably dangerous (and curious) place. Tell them that anything can happen, at any time, anywhere, and any place. Tell them that they should always keep their wits about them, even as they chase after that next high. And most importantly, tell them that they are about to enter the unspeakably dangerous (and curious) place that is this very unknown world--every time they swipe right."
Without further ado, here's what 5 college girls told me in regards to their Tinder experiences and advice they'd give to others.
1. "Always ask for height."
One of the girls I interviewed was not extremely tall, but tall enough at 5'7". One of her biggest laments was the disappointment she'd face when she realized she was taller than the guy she was trying to hook up with. It was a major turn-off for her, and among the four other girls I interviewed, they also agreed that height was often an issue for them as well, as it'd cause lots of disappointment later. Their advice? Just straight-up ask the guy how tall they are. "If you're serious enough about hooking up or going on a date with the guy, check ahead of time. Otherwise, you just wasted a lot of it."
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2. "Snapchat them first."
"Look, sometimes photos just don't cut it. You and I both know how staged Facebook and Instagram photos can be. Those are all sculpted and planned out, and the pictures of guys you see on Tinder are no different. If you wanna play it safe (especially if you're interested) just snap them. Seeing what they look like through vids, photos, and streaks in real-time are a great indicator of how legit the guy's looks are, and will give you the go-ahead to get going."
3. "Always confirm plans THE DAY OF. If you don't hear back from him, move on."
Three out of the four girls I interviewed reiterated this point. "If he's not 100% on board and and you're getting all dolled up to meet this guy, you just wasted a whole lotta effort AND makeup when you could've been watching Netflix saltily in bed later that night, thinking about what could have been. But now you have to get your dress dry-cleaned, and try not to waste your mascara."
4. "If he doesn't offer to pay for your Uber, he's not the one."
"Especially if you don't know where you're headed. It's always awkward to get into an Uber or Lyft and not even know where the heck you're supposed to go. But it goes both ways--if he pays for the Uber, and it pulls up and takes you off to the unknown--oh, honey."
Moral of the story: get the address beforehand. Even if he does pay.
5. "Make sure your age range is something you're comfortable with."
"If you're seriously looking to meet and get with guys, this is a must. Hooking up with hot thirty-year-olds sounds nice...until you realize that he's thirty. And on TINDER."
6. "Swipe cautiously."
This is an important one.
"You don't know these people in real life! They could be anyone--and that's not a good thing. If you feel like something's off, or something doesn't add up, or if the guy's really insistent, or if he wants to meet up somewhere out-of-the-way, don't be afraid to turn away. You don't know him, and he most certainly does not know you. So you do you.
Even if you do feel comfortable enough to meet up with him, let someone know where you're headed. You just never know, so be safe regardless."
7. "Always read the bio."
"It's a tell-tale sign to see if you're swiping right on a frat boy, a real boy, or a f*** boy. Don't get it twisted. After looking at the bio, proceed with caution."
8. "Tinder is a gray area."
"Listen, when you match with boys and start chatting with them, they will ask you why you're on Tinder. If you're looking to find a date, a dinner, or a one-night stand. It's almost like a business transaction. Try not to be put off by it, but always remember why you got on Tinder in the first place. Then roll from there."
9. "Tinder isn't for everyone."
This was echoed by every single girl I interviewed.
"Some people just can't handle it. Maybe it's the ease of instant access to hundreds of men and the conversations you have with them, but it really puts some girls off. I know it terrified my roommate, only after being on it for a week. But you have to realize--that's the reason Tinder exists. There are those who are on Tinder, and those who aren't. And they all know why."
And last but not least:
10. "Sex is always a consideration."
"Again, you don't know these people. Some people are on Tinder solely for hook-ups, while others aren't. When you meet up with a match, you don't know what's going to happen. Maybe you didn't go into the date with that intention, but the guy? You have no idea. Maybe it's the other way around! But, to answer your question if sex is always an option, it is. And that's just something you have to accept, especially in Western society. So keep your wits about you, and don't be afraid to ask the guy if that's what he's looking for. Because if it is, then the rest is up to you."
The world may be an unspeakably dangerous place, but sometimes our curiosity just bubbles over.
But just because you swipe right doesn't mean you can't be safe. Who knows, maybe you might even have fun in the process.
(I know these girls did, despite it all!)
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