Ladies, I'm sure at some point in our lives, each of us has whispered, shouted, or even publicly stated on social media that 'men are trash' but I want to pose this question: Are all men really trash, or are you just choosing the wrong ones?
The saying that nice guys always finish last is very true in our society today since many women flock to the 'bad boys' because in the immediate moment, they are so much more intriguing, but these circumstances can serve as downfalls. Yes, I get it, we like who we like and can't necessarily control who we are attracted to, but because of that, I think some of us need to change our mindsets.
Just because a man is popular on campus, has high status in his position, or quite possibly happens to be an athlete or rapper who makes a good amount of money, doesn't mean that he is going to treat you right. Stop going after these men for the clout or financial security you think it may bring you.
Not only will it end with a broken heart, but it will negatively impact how you view all men because of one that simply wasn't right for you in the first place.
It's time we hold ourselves accountable for letting the wrong people in and being naive in situations where there are already too many red flags. We as women need to go into potential relationships with pure intentions rather than seeking some sort of benefit from being with a man.
I only flip the switch and criticize us for once because we are constantly saying the same things about men when many of us have done the same thing at some point or another. Maybe it was on a small scale, but there are many instances where women and men alike go after one another solely because they think the other is attractive and could benefit selfishly from the label attached to the other's name.
However, in saying that, I believe we as women are strong, smart, and powerful on our own, so why is it that many of us find ourselves so distraught after going for someone who made it clear from the beginning that they weren't ready to take on all we had to offer, and then as a result blame all men for one particular man's mistakes?
I'll answer that: because sometimes we let the idea of shiny things cloud our judgment of what is really supposed to be for us in the universe, so when something doesn't turn out the way we hoped, we blame everyone who it may concern rather than start at the source of the problem--the man who initially hurt us.
I've learned over the years that you can't blame all men for the hurt that one man may have caused you at some point or another, because one day, what's for you will make its way to you and when that happens we need to rejoice in that rather than guard our hearts and block our blessings. Yes, some men are problematic, misogynistic, and outright terrible, but not all of them are.
Maybe instead of going after that cute guy nobody has anything good to say about, we should let the nice guys finish first for once.