I know your pain. I struggle with this almost every day, as do most people. Some days are much easier than others and I rarely think of anything except for what is happening in the moment, but some days you don't want to move from your bed because your brain just won't shut off. You can rethink one certain situation, or you can go all the way back to your childhood and think of a situation that somehow left a scar on you. Sometimes I will think of a situation that bothers me, then I will talk myself out of it and it will go away for a few days but somehow always finds its way back inside my head.
Most nights you can't sleep, you just wish and pray over and over again that your brain will stop and let you be at peace. Sometimes the thoughts are racing so much you wish you just wouldn't have to think ever again. This condition is real. It is scary. You are not the only one who struggles with this condition, so do not fear to be alone.
How I cope with my over thinking issues is a challenge every day but I always manage to push through. I try to resort to doing things that give positive results such as working out (going for runs really soothes my anxiety). I try cleaning my room or my car because it helps me distract myself for a little while, as do things like coloring an adult coloring book made for stress relief, taking a bath, doing my hair or makeup, reading a novel, yoga, and also sitting here writing for Odyssey. I also attend therapy every three weeks and I am not afraid of saying that I do this because it is probably the best hour of my life every few weeks. I am able to express all my feelings, whether they are happy emotions or sad emotions, and I am not judged.
This is a time I can express everything I am feeling to someone who is there to help me and look out for me without telling anyone else what is going on in my life. I always leave feeling refreshed. I started struggling with anxiety disorder when I was nineteen years old. My anxiety was so awful at the time it even had developed into depression which, luckily, I survived and overcame. My anxiety has decreased a lot since that time, but it is not fully gone; I don't think it ever will be and I've come to accept this fact. It may be getting better and better by each week but it will never fully escape me.
I have come to the conclusion that I am just an anxious person. It is hard for me to live in the moment and not worry about my future, and I constantly need reassurance from those around me. Everyone has their flaws and these are mine. I constantly think that the people who mean the most to me are going to leave my side, screw me over, or make me feel worthless because for a while this is all I was used too. I also have weird over-thinking tendencies of being afraid to get sick, or that I won't make it in my future and do what I want to do–it sounds ridiculous, but it's something I deal with. I constantly have flashbacks of my struggles from my past and it really sucks, let me tell you. When I do not have the reassurance the overthinking just gets worse and worse until I receive it. This is who we are and even though we are in a daily battle against our own minds we are strong and we never give up fighting. We get out of bed each morning with the utmost positive attitudes that we can have and we live each day. We should embrace ourselves, our imaginations, and love ourselves for who we are.
Stop trying to get rid of your anxiety, just let it be and find what works for you in helping improve it, whether it’s medication or meditation. The second most important thing to bettering your anxiety is to surround yourself with those who love you and truly care for you. Those who are there for you for every single moment you have a meltdown, those who can listen to the same thoughts you have over and over again and try their best to not get annoyed, those who give you that reassurance, and those who may not know exactly what you're dealing with and why but still stick around and can understand that this is you and they love YOU. The third and final most important thing is to not be embarrassed for being you. Do not surround yourself with those who think you are faking it and bring you constant negativity.
It is a very true saying that those you surround yourself with make a big impact on your life, be it negative or positive. Everyone is unique in their own way, ours just happens to be our vivid imaginations. You are great, thanks for being here.