What Not To Do To Someone With Anxiety
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

What Not To Do To Someone With Anxiety

We're not asking for attention. We're not trying to get out of something.

158
What Not To Do To Someone With Anxiety
A Conscious Rethink

Something I’ve noticed over the past few months is people’s tendency to make light of something they don’t understand; in this case, anxiety. Some people believe that having anxiety is someone just wanting attention or trying to get out of something, that we're just using it as an excuse.This isn't true, and I think people believe this, party, because of a lack of understanding of what exactly anxiety is. I myself experience anxiety, social anxiety, and perfectionism. I know plenty of people who have different forms of anxiety as well. It personally took me years to realize that I myself had any form of anxiety. It wasn’t until my junior year of college that I found out I had social anxiety, which stemmed from my perfectionism. It was only after that that did I realize what a hold anxiety always had on my life. Because of my lack of knowledge, I didn't understand the impact anxiety has, which seems to be a real problem now for others. People don’t seem to realize how common anxiety actually is, which causes them to say or do the wrong things to people with forms of anxiety, Even the most well-meaning person can make things worse if they don’t actually know what they’re talking about.

Tell us that we’re being dramatic or that we’re overreacting.

A lot of the time, especially during an anxiety attack, we know we’re being over the top about the situation but our emotions take over. We don't have control in these situations our anxiety does. It takes a while to gain back control so to tell us that we’re being ridiculous or making a big deal out of nothing makes us feel like there’s something wrong with us.

Don’t make us do things that make us uncomfortable.

Don’t tell us to just get over our anxiety. Pushing someone with social anxiety to do something they’re not comfortable with doesn’t help. We know it’s not a big deal to exchange a book at the bookstore or go talk to an adviser, but for someone with social anxiety, it can be a huge deal. Instead of pushing someone to do more, applaud them for what steps they did take and remind them that it wasn’t as bad as they thought. Having anxiety or social anxiety can cause someone to only think about the worst case scenarios. We assume that only the worse will happen if we have to do something. Don't let us get caught up in our own heads.

Get mad at us when we're having a bad day or having an anxiety attack.

If we ask you to leave us alone, don’t assume we're just being grumpy or mean. One symptom of an anxiety attack is when people are around you, you feel like you’re being suffocated like everyone is too close to you even if they’re ten feet away. It’s like the walls are closing in and you feel like you’re coming out of your skin. We appreciate your trying to help but let us have our space when we need it.

Tell us that you empathize with us.

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. If you have never had anxiety, you can’t do that. You can sympathize with us, but you can’t empathize with us. Don't act like you know what we're going through. We deeply appreciate your being there and trying to help but don't pretend you know what we're thinking and feeling. Don’t let your sympathy for us turn into pity either. Don’t treat us like we're some poor, pitiful creature who is about to break. Don’t be silent, though. When we're upset and saying that we can’t do something or that we're going to fail, speak up. Your silence is just a confirmation of our worst fears.

Do listen, do care, and do be there for us.

We know this is complicated. We know this doesn’t always make sense. We’re not trying to make things harder for ourselves or you. Anxiety can be the fear of losing control. It can be the fear of failure. It can be an obsession with being seen as perfect by everyone. It can come from anywhere and happen at any time. The biggest thing we want you to know is that we’re trying and we hope that you’ll try too.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

49977
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

31873
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

955360
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

180527
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments