This Sunday, countless arrangements of lilies, roses, sunflowers, tulips and more were delivered to the doorsteps of mothers across the country. Attached were small, handwritten notes with exclamations of love, describing how grateful people are to have such wonderful moms, grandmothers, god mothers, mother-in-laws and so on. There was no lack of Instagram and social media posts that detail why so-and-so’s mom is better than the rest, and infinite brunch-side cheers to the best mom in the world.
However, I do not stand by the bouquets, Instagram captions and toasts to my mom; nor do I advocate for that day's celebrations that will occur in her honor.
I am not pro-Mother’s Day. In fact, I am anti-Mother’s Day.
I love my mother, admire her character and can honestly hope that I do half the job raising my own kids that she has done alongside my dad. My mother has sculpted my understanding of the word “mom” as someone that is self-willed, engaged, selfless and driven. My mom has shaped my impression of not only motherhood but also being a good person who stands by her values and does what is right.
I tell my mom everything. She is the first person that I call when I need input on how to appropriately handle a situation. However, she is also the primary person I go to when I have exciting news to share. Although she may make me mad with the truths she fearlessly points out to me and doesn’t hesitate in putting me in my place when I need it most, she does so with good intentions.
With all of that said, you may be left wondering why it is that I am anti-Mother’s Day if I have a good relationship with my mom and admire her in the way that I do.
The reason I am against Mother’s Day is because, in a sense, the holiday implies that we should take one day a year, a small box on a calendar that has 364 other boxes, to thank our moms for all they have done for us. This holiday argues that it’s OK to only designate one day every year to celebrate these women.
I don’t want to commend a holiday that allows people to justify their lack of motherly-appreciation on only one day a year. If you’re going to post photos about how great your mom is, send her flowers telling her that she’s appreciated and lead toasts about how she’s the matriarch of the family, then why does that only happen one of every 365 days?
To all moms that were appreciated on Mother’s Day, please know that you’re not only appreciated on that one day but all the others before and thereafter. Yes, Mother’s Day is a nice concept. But to only tell your mom, “Thanks for being you,” once a year doesn’t come close to justifying everything she’s done, something I think we often forget about.
So thank you, Mom, today and every day. Love you always, every day of the year.
