Looking For Angels In Devils
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Relationships

Looking For Angels In Devils

What we do not know about other people, we fill in with ourselves.

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Looking For Angels In Devils
Wallsafari.com

Human being posses a psychological trait to where we fill in the gaps about what we do not know about other people with what we know about ourselves. Whether we realize it or not, we are all guilty of it. Nine out of ten times this is a negative attribute that works against the individual or the people around them. This is the main reason why people who are unfaithful to there spouses become paranoid and constantly accuse the other of cheating. The reverse is also true; people with good intentions assume the best in other people. For example, when I was in high school I dated a girl for about a year. We eventually broke up over nothing major; the primary issue was that I did not text her enough. We shared the same group of friends so it was important to me that we remain friends. About a month or two went by and I barely had any interaction with her but when I did it always went fine. Eventually it was revealed to me that she did not share my optimistic attitude. She hated me. I had series of long conversations to attempt to reconcile with her and it appeared to be effective. A few more months go by and I hear through the grapevine that she still hates me. I tried talking to her again to try and make amends once again. This time she was not willing to talk and it ended with her claiming that I was a terrible person, she was not going to explain why, and that she never wanted to speak to me ever again. At first I was distraught. I wanted to know why I was such an awful person. I felt like I had been very kind, patient, and forgiving with her. I could not figure out why someone would hate me so much. These thoughts did not last though as shortly afterwards our mutual friends told me that the only reason why she disliked me was because we broke up. I argued with them about how that could not be the case because she was better than that. We had already reconciled once and nobody holds onto hate for so long over something so minor after the other person gives them every chance for forgiveness. They told me that I was putting my own traits into her. After thinking about it, they were right. I would not act or feel the way she did so I filled in what I did not know about her with what I did know about myself.

Always remain skeptical and never assume anything about someone's character. Imposing ourselves on others in natural and often done sub-consciously. It is hard to control but worth the effort to possibly curve the effects. If is not far off from the legal definition of negligence, just because no resonably prudent person would act that way does not mean that no one will.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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