My Dearest Ticker,

An odd little thing you are.

You seem to be busy most of the time, you seem to never slow down. Also, I can't help but notice that you have a few cuts and bruises. Perhaps you should see someone about that?

You see, I've come to tell you that I appreciate the mind of your own. I find it fascinating that such a small part of me can have such a big role in everything I do. I see you in places I never thought I'd find you, and I can never help but to be completely intrigued by your way of getting things done.

Well look, Heart, I can't help but notice that sometimes I feel a vacant place where you should be. It's as if you up and left in the middle of a conversation. Like you had to take a breather, so in the process of that you left me on auto pilot. In this, my head seems to take over. Let me tell you something, my head is no good. Sometimes it aches from the thoughts I have, perhaps its an overbearing amount of pressure in your absence. As if, its so clueless when you're gone, so it always tries to take the easy way out, making random sharp left turns and speaking in the native tongue of GPS. So if possible, I'd love for you to be around more. Your attendance is obviously vital to any large conference that takes place inside of my mind.

Anyway, I didn't write this letter to confront or emphasize your mistakes or wrongdoings. I have a lot of good things to say about you as well. You see, I've come to find that in life, as any other normal person, I tend to never give the strongest parts of myself enough credit. But you should know that I do recognize your strength. I can feel you lifting weights and exercising the most sensitive parts of yourself, only to be sure that you can handle the next big thing.

I'm sure it must be hard work, it must be dark work. I wonder what my other body parts say about you during their down time. I wonder if they call you a kiss-ass, or if they are clearly jealous at your copious amounts of hours. I can't help but ponder if my lungs are irritated that I am giving you so much credit, or my brain feels a tad bit left out when I tend to lean on you for advice.

You match me step to step, but even so, I sometimes forget to admire your determination and recognize the fact that with you - I'll never truly be alone.

It's peculiar, really.

It's peculiar to think that this beat in my chest has been here for me before anyone else possibly could. Then so, how I spend my whole life using the melody in my chest to find someone whose beat could collaborate well with the humming in my soul. It may seem as if dancing solo to the rhythm placed in my veins just simply isn't enough. But please don't ever think for a second, my faithful friend, that I could ever find someone who's heartbeat even compares to the precious sounds yours creates. In a world of loneliness and betrayal, you have stayed so incredibly true to me. You are the one song I keep on repeat day after day and do not mind knowing all the words to.

Thank you for prevailing on days where I never would've wanted to, and for always being my alarm clock in the morning, even on days when my eyes decided they were too warm under my eyelids to even think about getting out from underneath the covers. You, the metronome in my body, conduct a song that makes it nearly impossible for all parts of me to not feel motivated to.

Thank you for releasing butterflies from my rib cages into my stomach as a fair warning that someones hands could feel very right intertwined with mine. Or for skipping around my chest as a fair "I told you so" when I finally kiss a person with a clean smile and a laugh that sounds like the Jeff Buckley version of Hallelujah. Absolutely. Friggin'. Magnificent.

Thank you for taking the dive into the deep pits of my stomach to inform me that maybe I don't always do the right thing.

And on all of those nights when fear left me stalled out on the side of the highway, where I couldn't call on pride to help, where no one could hear my cries of desperation, thank you. Thank you for showing up with cables and the eagerness to jump-start my courage.

I'm not very good with words, and apparently I am no better at thank you's. All I know is that on somedays, when I turn off all my lights, when I cocoon myself in a legion of blankets and self pity, when I find myself drowning in a lake of "What do I do now?", you stay.

A steady strong beat.

Music to my ears.

All I ask of you, my heart, is that you stay good. I know sometimes I don't treat you the best. You must get sick of me, I bet you do. Sometimes I tend to get sick of me too. It must be frustrating to always be second guessed and stomped on by pride.

But please know, there is not a single fiber of my being that doesn't believe in you. I am a difficult ropes corse and that you have learned to do blindfolded with your hands behind your back. With this, I'd like to say thank you one last time. You have grown with me, pained with me and loved with me.

My dearest heart, I am ending this with a promise.

I promise to take care of you the way you take care of me.

I will pick up the broken pieces and will gladly paste them back together myself.

I will give you time to heal and promise to never let anyone abuse you, or tell you who you are.

Despite time, despite responsibilities, I will find the right way to care for you.

I will be careful when I wear you on my sleeve and solemnly swear to never let someone with a fist under their fingernails even scrape your surface.

Lastly, I promise to let you call the shots, I give you free reign to drive me wherever you think I must go. I know with that comes trust, I know that there will be rerouting, illegal U-turns and possibly even a couple detours. Together we may speed, we may fly through lights and we may even crash, but at least I'll be playing your song on maximum volume. You best believe I'll be screaming along to every word and listening to everything you have to play.

For you, I'll be there.

Since God knows thats all you've ever been for me.

Sincerely,

The Speaker That Plays You So Proud